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Coping with the death of a loved one is a difficult step in life that we all must face at some time or another. It goes hand in hand with helping someone else cope when they have lost someone dear to them. We all mean well when we talk to them or try to help them but it can back fire on you if you say or do the wrong thing.

Distinguishing between the "right" and "wrong" things to say and do can be difficult to say the least. There are those phrases that can make a grieving person want to scream at you. The phrases referred to are the ones that everyone is given to say at times. It is lack of knowledge that make these things roll right off the tongue and into the ears of a grieving family member.

Here are some things that you should not say or do when you are attempting to ease the pain of others when they are grieving:

"They are in a better place"

This is a huge no-no. When you say this to someone suffering grief, you are saying the person they lost is better off not being in this world. What's more is that you may be speaking to someone that doesn't believe in God and therefore doesn't believe in Heaven.

This is never a good thing to say yet it rolls off the tongue like a well-rehearsed line from a bad play. If you find this phrase hanging on the end of your lips, it's best to leave it there. No grieving person will believe it and most will be offended by it.

"At least they didn't suffer"

What? They died, how could this not be suffering? Although that isn't what you mean when you speak this line, it doesn't help the person who has grief written all over their face. Remember that you are trying to be helpful. This item is better left out of the equation.

"You have to eat something to keep up your strength/You'll feel better if you eat"

To a person who is mourning the loss of a loved one, food is the last thing on their mind. In fact, the thought of food can make them sick to their stomach. They will not feel better if they eat either. There is much more to it than that when you lose someone you love. It is better to simply offer them something to eat or send food to their homes so that they can eat when they are ready. Pushing this issue will not help matters.

Do not avoid the person

This may sound a little odd but it does happen. This is especially true if the person who passed away is a child. People don't really know how to handle the situation so they stay far away so they don't say or do the wrong thing. This is not at all helpful. The only thing that you need

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