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Humor: Weather

by David Gittlin

Created on: February 26, 2009

The weather is not funny anymore. We will have to find another coping mechanism, another form of therapy to get us through frost bitten winters and beastly summers. Before you know it, weather jokes will become politically incorrect. With each passing day, the weather morphs into an increasingly serious subject.

I have fond memories of the weather as an old friend. It always had its good moods and bad, its ups-and-downs, but it always seemed to be there for me, especially in the spring and summer. I remember walking down tree-lined fairways, under a bright blue sky and a warm sun. In those days, a weekend round of golf was a walk in heaven. Those idyllic days are long gone. Weather nightmares haunt millions of people today. Drought victims, flood victims, tsunami survivors, anyone who has lived through a weather catastrophe will have trouble trusting Mother Nature again. These people have every right to think of the weather as an enemy rather than a friend. It is hard for me to imagine feeling like this, but then I've never had my house gobbled up by a tornado or flattened by a hurricane.

I think of the weather these days not as a friend or foe. I see it as a messenger. I believe it is trying to warn us, like a biblical prophet.

Who has sent the messenger? The answer is Nature. You cannot expect to abuse someone or something for centuries without them turning against you. Nature has finally run out of patience. Nature is very angry with us. You have to watch out for slow to anger types. They usually pack one hell of a punch. We picked on the wrong dude when we started messing with nature. The human race is famous for underachievement and stupidity, but this latest blunder of ransacking the environment is an award-winner. If we don't act quickly and decisively, the pooch will be screwed past the point of no return.

Winters are already beyond cruel in northern climates. The sun has become a grim reaper in tropical climates. Weather conditions around the globe have become capricious and downright vindictive. The polar icecaps are melting rapidly. Rivers and lakes that once provided life-giving water are drying up or dying from pollution. In twenty years, we may not have enough potable fresh water to drink. I can hear the Prophet's words ringing in my ears. "The seas will rise up and engulf your cities. The winds will blow the desert sands into a giant cloud. The sand cloud will grow until it swallows up the earth."

We have to heed the weather's warning. The time to act is now. Don't wait for the government to do something. The U.S. government has been dragging its feet on carbon dioxide emissions for over thirty years. We the people must accept the responsibility for global warming and the water crisis. We are like little children who have to grow up quickly because no one is there to protect us. Little steps can make a big difference if everyone makes the effort.

Read about the environment. Make your next car a hybrid. Personally, buying or leasing a hybrid is the last thing I want to do, but there simply is no other choice. Conventional gas cars have become a bad habit, like smoking or eating a steady diet of junk food. Ask your congressional representative and your senator to introduce legislation to cut carbon dioxide emissions to zero in the next five years. Don't ask for a plastic bag at the grocery store, or Borders, or Blockbuster. These are just a few of the little things we can do. Little things multiplied by the world population will generate positive changes with the force of a tidal wave.

Learn more about this author, David Gittlin.
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