by Wendy Owen

Created on: February 25, 2009

When you ask if marriage is really worth it I have to say no because I have been there two times. The first marriage lasted for twenty years and the second one for almost ten years. I feel like even though I got some great children out of my first marriage the pain that we all went through during that marriage was unbearable and it has left scars on me and my children both. After the first ten years we both seemed to become angry at each other for even breathing. We both wanted out but would not admit it to each other.

I feel like I wasted all those years when I could have been doing something for me instead I was raising children and being someone's little girl Friday or something and that in itself was very painful for me. I always stayed home with our children and although I loved every minute of watching them grow and learn I never did anything for myself.

After my divorce I left marriage number one and immediately fell into marriage number two without thinking. He two wanted me to sit at home and he brought four kids into the picture and with my four it was not easy but they were all grown so I figured it would turn out okay, that we would be one big happy family but I couldn't be more wrong. His children were spoiled adults that acted like children and were very jealous of anyone that was near their daddy. The ridiculous tantrums I am on the receiving end from his thirty year old daughter just turns my nerves into mush on a daily basis. It makes me wish I had never met the man in the first place much less tried to share my life with him.

Marriage is supposed to be a beautiful institution where two people share one beautiful life together, loving and supporting each other, but I have only found it to be a hurtful and ugly thing that takes your heart and makes it hurt for years. I have wasted my life with the dream of a happy ever after and now I sit unable to support myself because I was a homemaker who stayed at home waiting on a man hand and foot. Both of my husbands refused to let me take any type of schooling while I was sitting at home to better myself in the future and I am paying for it now. It was different when I was young, the female was expected to stay at home and take care of the house and raise the children while the husband worked and now that old fashioned idea has left me unable to care for myself properly because I have no idea how to function in today's society. Marriage is not worth it at all.

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