by Anna Sanclement

Created on: February 25, 2009

How to Raise a Brat

So, you want to raise a brat you say? Raising the perfect brat is not very complicated, but it takes a bit of work. Follow these steps and you'll be on your way to having a wonderfully structured perfect little brat in the making.

You should start right away; as soon as your baby is born he can hear you already so start by shaping him with encouraging words. Keep telling your baby what a great brat he will be and get him used to the word. After months of this positive reinforcement, your little brat in the making will be ready for the next stage.

When your baby is able to reason, that's when the fun begins! Repeat the word NO over and over throughout the day and make sure he learns it well. Encourage him to yell it as loud as he can and to say it every time you ask him a question. Give him sweets whenever he wants and if he throws his vegetables of the high chair tray make sure you tell him what a good boy he is as you clean up the mess. Teach him to hit when he is mad; if he slaps you in the face when you say sweet things to him award him with a cake.

Going out with your brat is a perfect occasion for him to practice bratty behavior. At the supermarket, for example, as he cries because he is bored, quickly take him to the cookie isle and ask him what cookies he wants and beg him to stop screaming. If he says NO! like you've taught him, tell him he can have as many cookies as he wants if he will just stop screaming for five minutes. You know you have done an outstanding job if your child says he will stop screaming only if you get him the cookies AND take him to the toy store and get him that video game he wants.

At the toy store, sweetly ask your brat to please put the cookies away while you are inside. Of course, if he is a true brat he won't do this and you even get extra points if he not only keeps eating the cookies in the store, but he leaves crumbs all over the place and throws the empty wrapper on the floor. Swiftly pick up after your brat, and let him take off running pushing people out of his way. Call after him, but make sure he ignores you and he keeps running. When you find him rummaging through a bunch of toys taking them out of the shelves, tell him if he helps you put the toys away you will buy him the toy he wants plus another one.

When you finally leave the toy store, with a bag full of new toys, your brat demands you take him to McDonald's. Tell him that it's very close to dinnertime and you'll just make him hamburgers at home.

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