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mine.

"I can't look at you Mark, I want to but I can't". I hung my head lower and as I moved I felt a small tear drop onto my t shirt , tears I didn't even register where coming. "You lied to me" i continue. "You lied about everything".

"I'm so sorry baby " he soothed, reaching up and stroking my hair. By now he'd positioned himself on the floor directly in front on my legs , his eyes never leaving my face. Although I had'nt looked at him yet I could feel his eyes boaring into me, like he was searching for answers on my face. Answers I knew wouldn't come, answers I didn't even know myself.

"You made me believe I was the most important person in your life, the only girl in your life, yet the whole time you where someone else's too." I hear my voice say, " you didn't even have the decency to tell me Mark, you let her tell me. You let someone else crush my heart , because you couldn't be bothered to tell me the truth." I intended the latter to come out like a statement but now the words are out there I realise it's more of a question to him. I want to know why.

"I didn't not tell you because I couldn't be bothered, I didn't tell you because I couldn't. I couldn't let you down. You where always the one who had faith in me" he continues, sounding almost believable. "You where the one who had faith in us".

Out of no-where I feel a rage build up inside me and for the first time I look at him. I really look at him. I take in the earnestness in his eyes and the almost pleading look he has upon his face and I shake my head at him.

"No Mark there was no us. That's what you made us. You made us into nothing" , I almost shout. By now the tears have ceased and for the first time since we broke up two months ago my upset has been replaced by anger. "You ruined what we had, I had a relationship with a person who wasn't real. I don't even know you" i exclaim , and as I do i begin to laugh. Not tummy aching laughter as I used to share with him, but real deep laughing to myself. Laughing at how much of a fool I'd been. Laughing at his petty attempt to justify his actions. Laughing at him thinking he could just turn up and expect me to forgive him. Laughing for what we lost.

"I don't know you" , I say looking deeply at him my face expressionless.

"Baby it's me" he implores, "Me, Mark. Your Mark. The Mark you know".

"No the Mark I knew is the person you made me believe you where. Not the person you are".

He shakes his head and grabs my wrist. "Look at me" he says. "Look at me".

And I do.

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