by Nancy Browne

Created on: February 22, 2009

My Heart's Anna

She was three weeks shy
Of her third birthday
When they brought her to me
Beautiful, sweet, little, Anna
With lovely, blond hair
Crystal-blue eyes
And her angelic smile

She couldn't speak
She couldn't hear
But her fingers knew
The language
And in the weeks to follow
She taught me silent words
Her gripping hugs and gestures
Unfolded with wordless echoes
Felt from one heart to another

Life had played a cruel trick
On beautiful, sweet, little, Anna
On her defective sensory system
Leaving her unable to perceive sound
Leaving no words in her vocabulary
Leaving her without a mother
Casting her to the aid of society

They said nobody wanted
Speechless, un-hearing,
Beautiful, sweet, little, Anna

It was near the end of the fifth month
When they came and took her
Brought her to a hospital
Ninety minutes away
Placed her in a ward
Where little girls go to die
Pumped her little body
With chemo and radiation
But leukemia was too much
For her long blond hair
For her crystal-blue eyes
For her angelic smile

Though my heart claimed her
There was no evidence
No DNA
No blood test
No final adoption papers
Nothing to prove that she
Could have been mine

So the tiny white headstone
With its cornered pink flower
Selected by the agency
Simply reads:
"Anna"
With the inscription below
"God's Little Angel"

They said nobody wanted
Speechless, un-hearing,
Beautiful, sweet, little Anna

God and my heart say
They were wrong

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