by Lilian Okado

Created on: February 20, 2009   Last Updated: February 22, 2009

Whoever said "Marriage is not a bed of roses" could not have been very far from the truth. Perhaps a much clearer depiction would add to that saying that "Marriage though a bed of roses has some thorns." It is for this reason that the moment a couple says "I do" and they sign and seal their commitment be it in a church setting or government office, they must then become aware of the fact that it is only after their initial experience with the thorns that exist in their marriage bed, that they will indeed begin to understand the reality of what a marriage is all about.

It is at this point that the real tests of their lifelong commitment will begin. And it is for this reason that learning early what makes a successful marriage and in turn how to save your marriage before it starts becomes important.

The recipe for a successful marriage:

Like all recipes a successful marriage is made up of various key ingredients; love being a one of them without which can make the marriage relationship very difficult. A couple must therefore be willing to work towards maintaining this key ingredient throughout their marriage life. Some of the things one can do to promote those feelings of love that can help save you marriage include the following:

a) Understanding commitment Commitment means different things to different people; but it must mean the same thing to a couple. Often married couples are heard to complain that they feel their spouse is no longer committed to their marriage because they no longer kiss them good morning or they don't take out the trash at night or they forget the important stuff like a birthday or anniversary. Understanding that commitment means understanding what is important to your spouse and in turn following through on those things will help your marriage a great deal.

It may be something as tiny as coming home early once a week, or making that phone call during the day, but these are the small things that make a couple feel committed in a relationship and are also the same things that break up a marriage. It also then means getting your priorities right. The day you got married you vowed to make your marriage a priority. You may not have used those exact words but in essence that is what marriage entails. If you want to save your marriage then your marriage must become your priority. This means that if you have to miss that 'girl's night out' or watching the game with the boys once a month, then that is what you should do.

b) Encouraging communication

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