by Nick Bianco

Created on: February 19, 2009   Last Updated: October 31, 2010

How you go to the bathroom in the woods depends mostly if youre a man or a woman. Naturally men have an easier time accomplishing this task, and they are usually quite adept at it. Men have been using the great outdoors as their personal rest room most of their lives. Women, on the other hand, are often intimidated at the thought of dropping trou and relieving themselves out in the wilderness.

Regardless of if you are a man or a woman, the first thing you need to do is to find a suitable location to do your business. If you are an environmentally-conscious type, you may choose to stay away from water sources like streams or rivers. A good place to look for is a large rock surrounded by trees. The trees will provide privacy, and the rock can be used to support your backside. A moss-covered rock is even better, since it will be like siting on a soft cushioned toilet seat. If a rock isn't available, a fallen log works just as well.

When you sit on your rock or log, it is important to keep in mind the trajectory of your bodily fluids. For this reason, it may be a good idea to completely remove one leg from your pants, and then sit with your legs wide. This way, you don't risk the possibility of soiling your clothing.

The next challenge is finding a suitable substitute for toilet paper. If you are planning a trip in the woods, it is a good idea to bring along paper towels in case you may need to use the bathroom. Personally, I like the individually wrapped packs of Kleenex tissues. They fit easily into your pocket, and are softer than paper towels. Sometimes, unfortunately, it may be necessary to use what Mother Nature has provides as toilet paper. Large broad-leafed plants can be used, since most plants with large leaves aren't poisonous. Maple leaves can also do the job. For the sake of convenience, it is usually better to gather up the leaves you are going to use as toilet paper before you actually begin going to the bathroom. There is nothing more awkward than stumbling around the woods with your pants around your ankles looking for the perfect leaf to use for wiping.

The next step is to cover your waste with soil. Otherwise, the scent from your waste may attract wild animals. This is important if you are camping nearby, because the last thing you want is a curious bear stumbling into your campsite. After the waste has been covered with dirt, find a stream and wash your hands. You can get your hands pretty clean by rubbing them with dirt and then rinsing them off in a creek or a pond. Even in the wilderness, sanitation and cleanliness are important.

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