by Kim Remesch

Created on: February 19, 2009

What is it about a purse that sends women to thinking like an ADHD kid on Red Bull and a pound of chocolate? Even the sanest, most organized of women fall woefully short when it comes to what lives inside that handbag.

I knew I was a candidate for an intervention when I was at the mall shopping, stuck my hand in my purse to get my wallet, and instead pulled out a pair of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle underwear. Not mine. And, in my defense, they were clean. A matching action figure was keeping it company in that dark abyss known as a purse.

Nowadays, I'm more grown up. Still, if you reached inside the denim bag I carry to work each day, you'll pull outanother purse. Wait, I have a point. As Ellen DeGeneres always says: "Here's my point, and I do have one." We're not allowed to wear denim at work. We can go barefoot or wear flip flops with those big obnoxious flowers on thembut we can't wear denim. The purse is my personal revolt. I'm a big fan of civil disobedience. It only works, however, when people know what you are doing and why. So far, no one seems to care, so I'll continue to lug the big denim bag around until I can get a witness and rattle some trees.

That other purse I spoke of, the one inside the denim hobo sack, is a tiny, black leather compact purse that has slots for a billion cards. I have lots of those: license, ATM, insurance info., credit cards, discount cards, my all-important Moose membership card, etc. You get the picture.

But it's not denim. So, during the week, I slip the highly organized black leather purse inside my blue denim, hippie throwback purse. Then I fill it up for things I'll need for the day. I guess that's where it all goes to hell in a handbasket. Extra sugar packets from fast food joints, pens that don't work and I mean to throw away, slips of paper with all sorts of important data on them.

For the record, my purse should not be a shambles. I'm an organization-aholic. I'm that crazy person who sorts the spices by alphabetical order and places them on the shelf with the labels facing forward. My clothes closet is a marvel as well. All white hangers, all facing the same way. Clothing is separated by function (pants, shirts, etc.), then color. Stripes put me in a quandary. I'm still working on a system.

And yet there's the jean purse with the purse inside. But in my case it's rebellion. Yep, that's my story.

You know what we NEVER find in our purse: money or keys. Okay, that's a lie. We find hundreds of dollars of unrolled pennies and nickels when we finally empty the pursenormally because the strap has brokenas well as keys to things we no longer own. It's why we complain about shoulder, neck and back pain. I'm sure there's an AMA Journal article that describes this "syndrome."

What you won't find is an article that really explains it all. The closest I've found is in a blog from a woman who said the purse reflects the stage of life a woman in. We find that we carry tiny purses when we are older, a reflection of our desire to unclutter life in general.

I thought that blog was brilliant! So, I printed it, folded it neatly and put it in my purse. I'll let you know when it surfaces.

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