by Krystle Hernandez

Created on: February 19, 2009

There is no doubt about it: breaking up IS hard to do. Whether you are fifteen or forty-three, whether you've been dating for two months or twenty years, overcoming the pain of a break up can be quite difficult. However, this pain is undoubtedly multiplied if the couple has been together for a long period of time. When two people are together for an extended period of time, they grow accustomed to one another's quirks, they know each other's likes and dislikes, and ultimately, they invest a lot of time and effort in maintaining their relationship. Unfortunately, not all relationships are bound to work out. So, how are we to deal with the break up of a long-term relationship? Take a look at the following suggestions to help you cope with your break up.

Breathe.

Needless to say, if you've been with one person for a long period of time, you're likely to have grown accustomed to sharing your life with that person. With or without your partner, you will have to undergo life's inevitable ups and downs. While you may have grown comfortable with leaning on your partner for support, now the task of overcoming the rollercoaster of emotions associated with breaking up falls solely on your shoulders. When you must experience the breakup of a long-term relationship, you will certainly come across a cycle of emotions ranging from frustration to guilt to depression. Don't be afraid to take a moment to breathe and recompose yourself. Before you make an attempt to "move on" from your relationship, take time to grieve for your loss. Let it all out. The more you breathe, and look at what has happened in a calm manner, the more prepared you will be to take the steps required to overcome the break up of a long-term relationship.

Evaluate.

After you have taken time to embrace the fact that you and your ex are no longer together, you will be more emotionally equipped to take a step back and evaluate your relationship as a whole. Think about the reasons why your relationship failed to succeed. Can you honestly say you were happy? Did you feel loved, secure? Were you both capable and willing of communicating and negotiating tough decisions? Was your partner genuinely happy? Take some time to mull over these questions, but remember: be honest!

Be honest with yourself.

Following a break-up, particularly the break up of a long-term relationship, we often fall into the trap of looking back on our former relationships with rose-colored eyes. We thrust our exes up onto a pedestal and think of

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