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How many of us have woken in the morning, hanging off the very edge of a king sized bed, an ice cold foot in our back and a hand draped over our head? Children, go through phases and many of the little darlings go through the "I need to sleep with you, Mommy." stage. The best way to avoid the process of transitioning a child back to his/her own bed is to not allow the transition in, however, that is not always realistic. There are many reasons we allow our children into our beds including, but not limited to, sickness, excessive fear, nightmares and frankly, just being too darned tired to fight it! Been there, done that! The issue comes when we try to get them back into their own space.

It's important to first have that talk with your child. Let them know you love them, but everyone has their own bed in the house and that is where they need to sleep. Set a goal a little in the future and let the child know, for instance, by Friday let's see if we can get you back into your own bed!
Begin a "room makeover". What types of things will make the child feel safe, content to be in his/her own space. Perhaps new sheets are in order. Letting your child pick out some cool new sheets can add to the desire to sleep on them! Perhaps there needs to be a change in the arrangement of the furniture as well. Changing things around a bit can make it feel like a fun new room.
Have fears developed? Adding a night light can be tremendously helpful. Children are also very much into magical thinking so performing some sort of ritual to rid the room of scary things (we did the boogie bye-bye dance!). This empowers your child as well as sends the "bad" things packing! If nightmares are an issue, buying, making or even drawing a "dream catcher" and hanging it over your child's bed can have them fall asleep more comfortably, knowing that the dream catcher will "catch" all the bad dreams.
Have a "practice" session. Make a game of going to the room and pretending it is night. The Child gets to lay down in the new bed' and pretend to fall asleep. Wait a few moments then wake" them with a good morning kiss and tons of praise for sleeping in his/her own bed!
Use a behavior chart. Set up a chart where the child earns a sticker for sleeping that first night in his own bed. A reward comes perhaps when he has two or three stickers. Rewards do not have to be extravagant gifts that cost tons of money. Create a small "grab bag" with little slips of paper that have different "rewards" on them. The child gets to choose from the bag and is surprised by the different types of rewards. For instance, the rewards' can be: "child's choice for breakfast" (so you have chocolate chip cookies once!) , "Gets to watch favorite movie before bed", "an extra book at bedtime" or "Mommy has to make cookies!" ( Kids love it when WE have to do something.)
Praise, praise, praise! We all love to be told what a good job we are doing. Being told what a "big" kid our child is, is sure to encourage the behavior we are hoping. And once the transition is made, everyone will have a more peaceful night!

Learn more about this author, Christine Sandor.
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