by Amaryllis Holloway-Turman

Created on: February 18, 2009   Last Updated: February 21, 2009

Disciplining your children is important. What is discipline? At what age does this start? What should you remember when disciplining your children?

Discipline is a way parents can teach their children that their actions have consequences and the importance of acknowledging that. Discipline starts when the child is a baby. Discipline for a baby will be different than discipline for a toddler. You might tell your baby "No" in a firm voice while shaking your head. But you might give your toddler a firm look or tap on their bottom.

There are some things that you, as a parent, need to remember. The very first is that consistency is the key aspect of effective parenting. As a parent, if you say you are going to do something, you have to follow through every time. This can be tiring, but every other part of discipline is connected to the ability of the parent to do what they say they will do the majority of the time. Children will continually test their parent's patience. Some children have very strong willpower when it comes to getting their way.

For example, if you tell your child that if he misbehaves you will take away his toy for 3 days, you have to do it. If you take away the toy, but give it back to him the next day because he whines for it, you did not completely followed through with your discipline. Although it may be a little thing, the child has just learned a way to manipulate you. Once your child learns to manipulate you, it will be increasingly difficult to effectively discipline him or her in the future.

It is also important for parents to think about what they are saying before they say it. Avoid exaggerations or lies when talking about disciplining your child. Some parents say "hot" as a way tell their children not to touch certain things. This is not correct because everything is not hot. It would be better for them to say "Do not touch that." Other parents have said things like "Touch that and I will break your arm". This is also incorrect. You would not deliberately hurt your child and they know that. Statements like that only encourage misbehavior because they cannot relate the consequences of their actions and disobey what you say.

Children need limits and boundaries. If you are consistent with your discipline your children will know their boundaries. They will learn what is considered acceptable behavior and what is not. Some parents let their children do what they want because it keeps them quiet. For example, a child may not want to stay in his

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