by Jerry Grace

Created on: February 16, 2009

"My mom comes home every night after working long hours at her job. She knows there is more to do when she gets home but she is home none-the-less. She sees me working on my homework at the counter, walks over, gives me a big hug and says, "Hi, how's it going?" Then she sits down beside me and asks me if I would like some help with a problem I am struggling with. She's like that. Always wanting to give me the best help she can even when she is really tired. She is the best mom around. My best friend's mom doesn't even do these kinds of things and she stays home all day being pretty." This is a story I heard from one of the young children I have counseled.

Definitely yes: working women can be good moms. Having been the counselor of many young children I have observed that just because a mother works or not does not determine whether she is a good mother. Some suggest that it is impossible to work outside of the home and maintain good relationships with your children. On the contrary, most women and men can do both things well. As a matter of fact, if a woman is miserable staying home with her children when she would rather be productive in other ways, she could actually be a terrible mother. These types of women have proven to feel unfulfilled and consequently more abusive.

Don't get me wrong, I don't think working women can be like commercials with women coming home from work and being a super mom- tossing cookies from a plate into the waiting hands of her children. But, they can still be available for school events, staying home with sick children, making dinner, and making special, positive memories for her children. Today, working women have numerous choices for meals which are healthy and are sometimes even better than an old fashioned home cooked one. One study supports this idea and suggests that children of working mothers fair no different than children with stay at home moms in regards to nutrition (http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?sec=healt h&res=9E0CE1D6143AF936A3575BC0A964958260&scp=2&sq=Children%20of%20working%20women&st=cse With the advancement in technology most appliances can cook a meal in less time than traditional appliances. Leaving a timer on or preparing the meal in a slow cooker can drastically improve the quality of a meal as well as leave room for more important routine tasks like helping with homework.

According to a study done by the http://www.workingamerica.org/, women spend more time with co-workers than family. However, this can be more attributed to the wage gap between men and women. Because of this gap women have to work more just to make ends meet. This means less time for their family; though not necessarily meaning less quality time. Most working mothers would rather spend time with their children than take care of their own needs.

There is no reason to believe that working women are less capable of being a good mom than non-working mothers. A good mother is a good mother whether she works outside of the home or is a stay-at-home mom. So, for the purpose of this article, a good mother is one who takes the needs of her children seriously and will sacrifice her own well being for the health, safety and welfare of her children. Working at home does not constitute making a better mother; it is the attitude and nurturing nature of the woman of a child which represents a good mother. This being said, working women can be, will be, and are good mothers.

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