by SFLynne

Created on: February 15, 2009

When I look into the mirror my eyes deceive me, it has been so long now, why is this pain so clearly written on my face, only I can see beneath my eyes and only I can see this black shadow that covers my face,

I am a great pretender, you can not see the scars that lie beneath my surface, this shadow is a shield I have created, at times this shield becomes weak, only during this time is my pain revealed to you, for everyone to see,

At these times when my surface is fragile I must hide, I mustn't be seen by anyone, I will disappear until the walls become strong enough for only me to see once again,

I do not try to fool you, I mean you no harm, it is at these times I must surround myself with darkness, a darkness that has no windows or doors, I will hide here until it is safe,

In just moments I can become the self that you all know, when my protection is strong again I will reappear with this shell that wraps around me and wait and live,

I will continue to lose myself to you when my shell cracks and when it is mended, I will reappear again and be on guard to any pain that tries to invade my body,

Perhaps someday this shell will be broken and you can see what is me, but until then what you see is but a shadow of me......

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