by Triple Witching

Created on: February 15, 2009   Last Updated: February 16, 2009

It's a Daily Struggle With Selective Listening of Early Primary School Students

Does every parent resort to screaming at the top of their voice once they have been ignored for the umpteenth time by their 4-7 year old children. Is it really just a phase? Was I like that when I was a child? Surely not my father would have got the strap out if we continued to ignore him or speak back to him.

Yet as I stand at my son's bedroom door in the 21st century and once again reiterate a very simple instruction about putting his shoes on, he either says politely, "I just have to do" or, "stop bossing me around", or just plain ignores me like I'm a ghost unseen and unheard. Needless to say, all I am trying to do is leave the house to either get to school on time, which is my duty as a parent, or get to an activity on time, which, mind you, HE CHOSE to do.

At the time of enrolling in any extra curricular activities, all I had in mind is my child's happiness when he participated in something that interests him. All I expect in return is a set of ears which work when they should, a mouth which blurts only respectful answers and a body which responds to my apparently endless bossing around by performing the simple tasks assigned.

If the mind of that body could only see that I am only trying to do the right thing by them, they would not regard me as bossy'. However, it is my belief that this is a cognitive process which is not yet provided to children of preschool and early primary school.

Good and Bad Past Strategies

My strategies with dealing with this situation vary with my mood and how many times I have been ignored that day. If all is good, I can sometimes last for about 6 or 7 times asking and other times I go straight to the yell stage if all avenues have already been spent on other simple requests throughout that day.

So my natural reaction to their lack of cooperation is usually maybe they didn't hear me?' As I like to give the benefit of the doubt, I always seem to raise my voice a little, change the instruction, add a please at the end and check directly by asking if they have heard my voice.

They sometimes catch on to that though and don't even answer that question. This I know, because often they were standing exactly 1 meter away from me, the TV was off and they were not talking to anyone else at the time or engaged in any other activity.

My other favourite test is to mutter very quietly under my breath that there will be no dessert tonight unless those shoes are on within

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