by Robert Stadnik

Created on: February 12, 2009

We routinely hear about God in our culture. People preach about him on the streets, in Church, on television. He's everywhere and, supposedly, all knowing. You can't hide anything from God and he, or she, expects nothing but good things from you. His counterpart, on the other hand, is always given a bad rap. When ask about Satan (who also goes by the devil, Beelzebub, Antichrist, or Mr. 666) people instantly think 'evil'. Such thoughts are superficial and don't really address the complexities that define the core of this supernatural deity. The reality is that Satan is much more of a laid back individual than God.

God hates sinners. If you sin, you're instantly on God's hit list. Sure, he still loves you unconditionally because that's his shtick. Satan, on the other hand, loves all sinners. Doesn't matter if it's a small infraction or big sin, Satan's got your back. Went on a five day murder spree in downtown Chicago? You're not a sinner, Satan would say that was taking initiative. Had numerous affairs behind your spouse's back? You're not a sinner, Satan would say you were playing the field. So while God's up there condemning your actions, Satan's right there giving you a pat on the back for thinking of yourself over others.

God's not the only divine presence who has the corner on religion. Satan's got his own band of loyal followers who have established a church dedicated to the Antichrist. Although Satanism doesn't qualify for tax exempt status, converts from the Catholic Church will find Black Masses not too dissimilar from what they're accustomed to on Sundays. Satanists use the same prayers: The Our Father, Holy Mary, except in a Black Mass you just have to recite the words backwards. People think that Satanists sacrifice animals at the altar, which isn't true (if you want to sacrifice animals go see those Santeria people). And if you love black you're in luck. Black is the unofficial color of choice in the Satanist Church.

Heaven is the reward for those good people who spent their lives trying to live in a manner that would please God. But Satan doesn't discriminate who gets to go to Hell. Everyone's invited and that could only mean that Hell is just one big party. As a bonus, people can find out what Hell will be like before they die. All they need to do is spend summers in Phoenix and they'll know what an eternity of fire and brimstone will be like.

Satan doesn't judge you or label you as good or bad. He's a laid back individual who's happy to have anyone and everyone be a part of his circle. There's no pressure from him on how to live your life. All you need to do is pledge your soul to him.

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