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Do you respond to certain situations in a manner that is not appropriate because we are not seeing the clear picture due to our own lack of self esteem, lack of self respect, and in turn we are unable to love ourselves.

I can tell you that seven years ago, I was always right, I judged every situation wrong, I blamed everyone else around me for my woes, my mistakes, and my just plain depressing existence. On the outside I looked and acted as if I had high self esteem and self respect. I acted as if I loved who I was, and in actuality I hated myself, my life, and it clouded my ability to see people and situations for what they really were.

Interestingly enough, I could see nature and all the beauty around me for what it was and what it did for my spirit; which was lifted it momentarily. Those moments when I saw nature clearly, and it brought me peace, where enough to keep me going and start to internally change who I was and the way I looked at everyone around me.

What people need to realize is people are not out to get them or make their life miserable. We are all existing in our own world's. The problem is our egos. We really think we are the center of every conversation, discussion, and gossip session. When reality is, we are nothing, we don't consume other peoples thoughts and conversations.

Yep, the teller at the bank might be rude to you, but maybe she just got a call that her daughter is sick at school, and she can't leave her station to pick up her child. Or maybe when you walked up to a group of people at the gym all of a sudden they concluded the conversation and moved on. Most likely, they weren't talking about you. Maybe they had been standing there for ten minutes already, and needed to get going. If your husband is short with you for a week, rolls over in bed, and gets up early the next morning for work don't assume he is having an affair. Don't start the accusations. Maybe the company is downsizing, and he doesn't know how to tell you.

See the situations for what they are; you don't know what they are because you don't read minds. We need to start returning rudeness with kindness, insecurity with security, caring more about what others think about you to loving yourself more than ever having the need to contemplate what people are thinking about you! Put your rosy glasses on and see situations with your eyes wide open, and realize the only person you can control is yourself! Let go of the need to please, to bend over and be walked on, and adopt the attitude of gratitude.

Be grateful for everything you have, everyone you love, including yourself, and everyone that loves you! Now next time, you start to see a situation in a light that makes you start to sweat, your blood boil, your head spin, stop yourself and see the situation for what it is; none of your business, and if it is your business have enough self confidence and love yourself enough not to get defensive, but face the situation with love and kindness.

Learn more about this author, Heather Hogan.
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