"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me" is just not true. Words are incredibly powerful. They can build someone up and make them feel like they can move mountains or they can crush a person's spirit completely. We often underestimate the power our words have on others. We say things without thinking how it will affect someone else and can end up hurting them when we did not intend to. There are other times when we purposely say things with the intent to hurt someone, usually because we ourselves are hurt.
Careless words spoken in anger, thoughtlessness or because somoene hurt you are sharp dagers that can pierce the heart. I do not think there is one person that can say they never had their feelings hurt by someone saying something to them that was not "nice." Words carry huge impact, many of our insecurities and fears are a result of us hearing something about ourselves that we did not view as positive.
Words we hear from the people in our lives can make the difference between a good and a bad day. Often what makes a day "bad" is that someone said something that upset or hurt us.
While we should be careful in how we speak to others and not speak out of anger or with the intention of putting someone else down there are times when in order to be a good friend it is necessary to tell someone something that they do not want to hear. Often the truth about ourselves hurts when we hear it, but the important thing is that we speak the truth in love and that along with telling a person something "unpleasant" we also take the time to let them know something positive about them.
Too often we think others just know what we feel about them. We think they know that we appreciate them or think they are great so we do not express that. We do not tell them how we feel about them or tell them when they did a good job at something. But it is important to verbally express those thoughts. Those words can lift a person's spirit. Words of encouragement help so much.
In our world today we are bombarded by a lot of negative messages. We aren't pretty enough, skinny enough, we don't have the right job, we don't make enough money etc ... If we do not receive some positive words of encouragement we can beat ourselves up focusing on the negative.
Chose your words carefully and make sure that you do use your words to encourage others. It may not feel natural to tell someone that they did a great job, that you really like a certain aspect of their character or even simply that you love them, but by telling them that you could be making their day.