by Tom Schiavon

Created on: February 09, 2009   Last Updated: February 11, 2009

It would be difficult to argue that Divorce is not mentioned in the Bible, since it is mentioned throughout both the Old and New Testaments. The question should be "What does the Bible say about divorce?" Perhaps a better question would be, "What is God's attitude toward divorce?"

It is clear that God hates divorce from verses like Malachi 2:16. But what does that mean? Why does God hate divorce?God hates divorce because it harms people, who are made in his image. Marriage was made to be a safe way for a man and a woman to enjoy fellowship, companionship, sexuality, and children. Divorce destroys this bond of marriage and creates hurt and pain in the lives of the people involved. Speak with any divorced person and they will tell you that the emotional scars run deep for both parents and children. This was the reason why it was not easy to get a divorce in ancient Israel, and why it was difficult to get one in Western societies until recently.

What do we say then about abusive husbands (or wives, for that matter?) Should we believe that, since God hates divorce and its consequences, that He desires for people to remain in abusive situations? I would argue that He does not. This does not mean that one should file for a divorce lightly. The Bible is clear that spouses are to love and respect one another, and that not doing so is to negate the very character of marriage. Repentance, forgiveness, an reconciliation are always to be preferred. Perhaps separation for a time until counseling can be conducted is the best way to deal with things.

Yet sometimes counseling does not help the situation. Sometimes hardness of heart is so deep, and the refusal to seek intimacy so ingrained, that reconciliation is impossible. This requires some wisdom to deal with it. Paul makes it clear in I Cor. 7 that it is better to remain "as you are" in regards tp separation. Jesus only gave one condition for divorce, which was adultery. The Westminster Confession of Faith is helpful in clearing up some of the confusion.

Their statement is that it is for reason of adultery or desertion by one party that cannot be remedied that one is allowed to divorce. In that case, one may divorce and remarry, considering the other party to be dead, since they have not kept their marriage vows. This makes it so that someone who is legitimately wronged and is the victim may be protected and not harmed by the very institution that was top protect them and bring them enjoyment.

It is clear that the Bible speaks of divorce. God hates divorce, but not because He is a stingy taskmaster who wants people to be unhappy. God hates divorce because He loves people.

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