by Eddie Alexander

Created on: February 07, 2009   Last Updated: February 23, 2009

I love the Scots. They gave us bag pipes, some awesome castles, a good Mel Gibson flick (with a brilliant soundtrack), and they even made it acceptable for men to go commando in skirts. Our very economic system also has Scottish roots since capitalism was first described by a Scot named Adam Smith. That's a solid cultural contribution if you ask me, but it doesn't end there. Beyond kilts and capitalism, the Scots also tried to pass on timeless advice in the form of proverbs. And in at least one case, they failed miserably. For although this proverb has gained widespread acceptance, its meaning is downright destructive.

Blood is thicker than water or so the saying goes. Unfortunately, this is not just a harmless statement about relative fluid viscosity. This problematic proverb has a much deeper meaning: family comes first. Before best friends, girlfriends and anything else, family should take precedent. Well, I for one disagree.

On the surface, this saying seems practical enough, perhaps even noble. But in reality, it's just a mainstay for the family freeloader. (We all have at least one.) Though the family freeloader is curiously absent from my immediate family, there is no such shortage among the rest of my relatives. My aunt is a great example. She rents a house from my parents at a discounted rate and still isn't always able to make the monthly payment. My parents vigilantly monitor her checking account to avoid $35 overdraft charges. Yet her account balance frequently drops below zero in spite of their efforts and my parents proceed to bail her out each time. This terrible tenant has been draining my parents resources for nearly twenty years and it's all justified by a single deadly phrase: "She's family." And because "she's family," this arrangement can and will be perpetuated indefinitely.

I can still hear my mother's plaintive defense: "What would you do? I mean we can't just leave her on the street." Each time she tells me this, the tone betrays her contempt for my apparently calloused nature. It's a tough situation-more so even than I'm letting on-and I don't know what I would do. However, if my brother got down on his luck, I know I wouldn't let him bring me down in the same way and he wouldn't ask me to. (He and I made a pact a long time ago not to be delinquents.) The question is am I heartless or rational? Perhaps they go hand-in-hand.

My grandfather provides another poignant example of why family shouldn't always come first. Weighing in at over 300

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