by Gabriella Samms

Created on: February 06, 2009   Last Updated: February 13, 2009

No one relishes the thought of having an argument. It creates tension, resentment and can sometimes completely destroy a relationship. However, because no two humans can exist in total harmony (don't believe those who've claimed they've never argued), it is inevitable that some time or another one person will need to voice a topic that another feels completely different about.

Arguments don't have to be seen as an unsavory battle. What determines the outcome is how both parties react when in a heated moment. Those that have mastered the art of productive arguing will tell you that it takes time, patience and the ability to resolve the conflict instead of winning it. However, many want to come out the winner instead of being able to claim that an issue was addressed and solved.

Arguments can start due to a variety of issues i.e. infidelity, backstabbing, family squabbles, work responsibilities, or just plain stubbornness on one individual. The list is endless and often quite ridiculous at times. However, the sooner you learn the tips of fighting fair, the better chance you'll have at solving and snuffing out the issue without lasting negative outcomes.

Listed below is some good advice to follow when you find yourself involved in an argument. These tips don't ensure the argument will end instantly, but they will help an argument from escalating or leaving one party feeling that they really didn't have a chance.

1. Make sure the topic is worth your time and energy:

Is getting all upset because someone forgot to put the toilet paper on the role really worth an argument? Certainly this can be solved by a simple "please".

2. Each person should be given their own uninterrupted time to explain their concern and be heard:

If only one person does the finger pointing and doesn't allow the other to have any input, you will never solve the issue. Whether you want to hear the other's side or not; let them speak and listen to what they are saying. You would expect to have your own turn when it's your time. If you are both talking at the same time, what can be heard?

3. Don't use cut downs or verbal insults:

If you're trying to get your point across you won't be heard if you are demeaning someone. The victim will shut down or fight back the same way you are. Verbal abuse will not solve anything; in fact, you'll have another argument on your hands if you decide to use this type of action.

4. Don't act as though what you are hearing isn't important to you:

The argument began because there

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