by Mj Ferruzza

Created on: February 05, 2009

"I know why a number of fathers want no part in their children's lives after a divorce. The lawyers, the bickering, the accusations, the tattle telling, the scheduling, the emotions, the hurt and the money issues. I know the reasons why quite a number of fathers disappear after a divorce. I don't condone it. But I know the reasons why they do!"

There is almost certainly nothing more stressful than losing day to day contact with your children. For fathers, the court system seems to have created an unfair bias against them. Many fathers do survive the divorce and family settlement proceedings unscathed, but a large majority do not. In the following paragraphs, I will detail just exactly how to plan and organize yourself as a divorced dad to stave off unnecessary heartache and nonsense. Follow these steps and you may find a bit solace and comfort. Remember! Millions of fathers are going through the heartache of the broken family, but staying involved. By doing so, you are already a winner.

Here is the Divorced Dad Survival Guide:

1. Get over the hurt as quickly as you possibly can. Children do not want their parents to harbor resentment to the other, no matter how bad the situation which led to the divorce. The children that take sides were pushed into that direction from one or both sides. You are hurt and there will be issues, but try to take the high road here. The father who uses his children to punish the ex-wife is in fact punishing himself, in his future relationships with his children. Children are sponges and feel and store emotions just as well as they do with angry words.

2. Time issues. You may lose time with your children in day to day life, but your time is now quality time. Every minute is more meaningful. Make it so.

3. Bond early. bond deeper. The earlier you show respect, encouragement and nurturing to your child, the deeper you have built a trusting, loving relationship. They once did a study on successful career men and women and those that could remember their best childhood memories with their parents all said they were constantly told that they were loved. Be genuine in your emotion, you can be angry, hurt and disappointed by your ex, but you will always love your children!

4. Be there! No one can stress more just how important it is to make every and all trade-offs and scheduled time with your children. You are staving off their fear of abandonment. You are teaching them that you will be there, even when you are not.

5. Cut through the BS! At

• 1
• 2
• Next Page >>