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his office is just across the hall so he will be keeping a jaundiced eye on them. Bender suggests closing the door and "getting the prom queen impregnated". This angers both Claire (Molly Ringwald) and Andrew (Emilio Estevez) and then Bender gets an epiphany...has Sporto been giving the princess the, as it is poorly dubbed on TV (in Ernest Borgnine voice), "hot love affection"? There's one scene that never sat right with me. When Principal Vernon is dishing out detentions to Bender the likes of which we have never seen in cinematic history. He pings Bender for 2 months of hard time in the school library. To make his point Principal Vernon gives Bender the full Ronnie James Dio "devil-horn" metal hand! I kind of suspect it was like a secret code. Like he was hammering Bender in front of the other "kids" to save face but using his metal-hand to secretly say, "Dude...you, me, beer, and the new Krokus album at my house- tonight!" Bender, who apparently is no fan of Krokus, lets out with a resounding "#%&* YOU!" It sounded weird but I just figured it was sound waves reverberating through his enormous nostrils.

Claire sneers at Bender saying such things as, "Only burners like you get high", and accuses him of attending "heavy metal vomit parties"...WHAT? What the hell kind of heavy metal information has this girl been receiving?! Of course I shouldn't be suprised. Claire gives me the impression that she'd believe anything told to her regarding a misunderstood subculture. If I told her that punk rockers like to have parties where they glue squirrels to their backs she'd probably believe me. Bender talks some serious smack about Claires name as being a fat girls name. I think it was an association thing. Claire sounds like eclair which is a fattening pastry treat. What else was he to think?

There is a lunch scene where all the "kids" bust out their lunches and we see that Andrew, aka-Sporto, has enough food to feed a small country, Claire has...(sigh)...sushi, Allison (Ally Sheedy) has some nasty Pixie Stix, Cpn' Crunch, Wonderbread mix. It's Brians (Anthony Michael Hall) healthy, food-group represented, lunch that sends the lunchless Bender over the edge and leads him to make fun of Brians fishing & homework laden family. When called on his fun-making of other peoples families we learn that Bender lives in a slightly rougher household where his dad apparently has a penchant for back-handing Benders mom and turkey pot-pies. No one believes him until he shows

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