by Beverly Bart

Created on: February 02, 2009   Last Updated: February 15, 2009

Long fingers smooth over the final page of the journal. Perhaps there is a bit of trembling apparent in that action. Certainly the signature is easily recognized, no break, no wavering there. Seeing His signature looking so normal, adds a sense of surrealism to everything. Slightly bleary eyed the clock face wavers and he slowly focuses and realizes four hours have passed. A breeze from the partially open verandah door stirs the pages as if unseen fingers are flipping the pages to the very beginning. The words, seem to take life leaping before his eyes the whole night being replayed, and is that not what he intended when he with painstaking detail endeavored to record, mind stumbling, record, record what , an event, a dream, perhaps the activity of an over stimulated mind. Certainly, the evening started with the struggle of working on a speech. A very important speech that needed to be like no other ever written, needed to be a speech memorable for its message. Mesmerized he starts to read,

I need to set down in written word, in tangible ink that which has transpired, that which seems fantastical and intangible. I need to do this for my own peace of mind. I know I was awake, fully conscious when the following events and conversation transpired. It was just a few minutes past 10 p.m. I found myself standing before the verandah doors gazing out over the lawn in thought. I was searching for words for my speech. I knew that others were working on the very same speech to assist but I needed to know I could myself, bring words to inspire. I remember bowing my head, shoving my hands into my pants pockets, thinking how many have stood as I have, when I felt a cool breeze at my back. It touched my subconscious pulling me from my thoughts as it registered the coolness was coming from within the room, not from the window. Turning my head slightly to look over my shoulder I found myself gazing at a seeming mist. I suddenly could not move, speak, just stand and watch.

The mist seemed to be trying to form, surely my imagination. However, even as I tried to hold that thought, a form it did take. A tall man, yes man, lean faced, cheeks seemingly hollowed. Part of my mind seemed to acknowledge what I was seeing another part was rejecting the possibility. More and more details emerged and were recognized. I noted sideburns, lines around the mouth. Details started coming faster, broad shoulders, height, and leanness almost gangly. A long coat, definitely not a current fashion.

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