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Football's effect on relationships

Or, Honey, You're Blocking the Superbowl

To look at me, you'd never know I once had aspirations of being a professional athlete. Perhaps it's because that was more than 30 years ago, and I was barely six years old. That's the age before anyone starts to tell you to be more realistic, the age when it's okay to want to be a circus clown or a ballerina.

I didn't want to be just any professional athlete, either. I had my heart set on quarterback for the Dallas Cowboys. As a feminist, I'd like to think my leanings toward equal opportunity started young, but the truth is that this particular dream was undoubtedly a result of my kindergarten crush having moved to Dallas. Lawsuits had not yet won girls the chance to try out for football, and I remember asking my mother if she thought a girl could be a quarterback. Mama was an avid Steelers fan back then. That being the era of Staubach and Bradshaw, we frequently found ourselves on opposite sides of the Superbowl. Whatever she actually thought, she told me if a woman were good enough, maybe she could.

There was the rub. At six, my most athletic activities were weeding shrubbery and climbing trees with a book in my hand. By the first grade, I was firmly entrenched as next-to-last chosen for kickball. Only my classmate Marie, an overweight asthmatic who was also the sweetest, most soft-spoken child I've ever known, saved me from being dead last.

Things haven't changed much in adulthood. The first and only time I've played volleyball since high school P.E., I ducked the first time the ball headed my way. I can't throw a basketball far enough from the free-throw line to hit the bottom of the net. None of this prevents my being a fan of football and college basketball, not coincidentally my mother's sports-of-choice. I occasionally regret that I didn't learn to play either, but I do score points when I'm the only woman in a room who can spot a player off-sides or traveling.

The media doesn't do a very good job of telling us it can be otherwise. I once ran across a questionnaire in a women's magazine where one question rating the health of a relationship asked how your significant other would spend the Superbowl if it fell on your anniversary. For me the question was moot: Anniversary or not, we'd both be in front of the game.

I'm not suggesting it's necessary to be a sports fan to have a good relationship with someone who loves sports, no matter what either's gender may be. My father has far less interest in athletics than my


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