by Ahmad Saeid

Created on: January 31, 2009

What's the magical thing about being a writer? Why is it so sweet and relieving to write? What is it that lies inside us and desperately needs to get out? Is it suffering that we went through at some time in our lives? Or maybe it's the need to be understood that makes us reach to other people far away from where we live, or even from when we live, to prove our sanity to ourselves? I need to write, I know that for sure, what I don't know is, why do I need to write?

Perhaps it's feeling the ability to choose after typing every word, where do we take our story, our article, our meaning, our thoughts, and our readers from there. After each and every word we decide, we make a decision about where will the train of thoughts head to, it's more like a balloon of thoughts rather than a train, and our ideas, our choices are the wind that states the direction.
It's the desire to create a world according to our own rules, no gravity, no physics, no limitations of any kind, we set the rules, we make them and break them, liberating ourselves from reality, from our physical abilities, and opening the door for our imagination to take control, or to lose control. It's our ability to control, and our liberation from control.
Is it thoughts so deep inside us that cannot come out in regular conversations, or speeches, that needs to be formulated into papers in front of our eyes so that we can see it and follow it down deep into our souls and personalities, to uncover our core values and beliefs, that can be easily distracted by listeners?
Or maybe it's a state of meditation, where we leave our bodies and evolve into higher existence that makes it possible for us to create and to see things clearly, to analyze and to understand everything better, without being reserved by social standards and expectations!
When we write we are alone, we don't see the reader, but yet we think about him, the reader is here with us, not physically of course, but his presence is so influential, that he somehow writes the story with us, he is the person we are talking to in the end of the day, we are not talking to ourselves when we write, we are not even talking when we write, we are listening to that sound inside us, and to write is to unleash that voice, and to enjoy listening to it.
It's something common, something humane and natural, something too good to be described, and too smoky to be captured, it's inspiration, the moment when you read what you are writing, and think: where does all that come from? It's not me talking! It's at least a very deep "me", somewhere I've never been, somewhere I never dare to go by myself, and I need the imaginary reader to accompany me to that place, to discover what lies beneath myself, or above it, the sound of my soul maybe, the voice in my head, or even the principles I've always believed in and never ever followed, chasing me, coming out to tell me that I'm wrong, to show my hypocrisy to the world, or maybe it's what I want to be, if I will loosen all my earthy desires and passions, or it can be my most sinful passion, I'm not writing this now, it's just writing itself through me, so forgive me if it's irrational, because "I'm not there".

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