by Samantha Diss

Created on: January 30, 2009

A new baby brother or sister

The kisses that turn to bites, sudden slaps over the head and your new-born left screaming from an over enthusiastic cuddle. You may expect your toddler to be overjoyed that they have a new baby brother or sister, but somebody once said to me that to a toddler bringing home a new baby is like your husband bringing home a new mistress and expecting you to be delighted. To them a new baby may seem like a threat to their close relationship with you, and their insecurities can come out in many different ways.

So start preparing your toddler for the arrival of the new baby in the last few months of pregnancy, tell them directly and truthfully about the coming birth, you can find plenty of good books to read with them about the arrival of a new baby and these will help them adjust to the idea of a new member of the family.

If your child is old enough to understand, involve them as much as you can with the pregnancy, take them to your scans if possible and let them feel the baby kicking. let your child help make simple decisions about the babies room, such as' do you think the baby would prefer ducks or teddy bears on his curtains' ? and what drawer do you think we should put babies socks in'?.

Once the baby is born, the first meeting between the baby and older child can be an important moment. Try to arrange it so that you are not holding the new baby when your toddler meets them for the first time. Give your child a cuddle and let them greet the baby in their own time. It can also be a good idea to have a present ready for your older child to receive from the baby.

When you get home encourage your child to help with the baby as much as possible, fetching nappies and helping at bath time can make them feel useful and involved. Also although it is difficult in those first few weeks try to keep as much as possible to your toddlers routine, continue taking them to their childminder, playgroup or nursery, they need to know that not everything has changed.

It is not uncommon around this time to find some children who will resort to babyish behaviour wanting to have a bottle, breastfeed or to sleep in their old cot, it wont do any harm to let them and most will get bored very quickly.

It is also a good idea to avoid any big changes around the time the baby is due, so he doesn't associate the two events and feel displaced. If you intend to potty train or move your child from a cot to a bed, attempt to do this at least four months before the baby is

• 1
• 2
• 3
• Next Page >>