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a boyfriend just so she could be in the loop, then dumping him right after Valentine's Day, leaving the poor defenseless guy to mend his crushed ego.

As boys become men, they still don't have a chance at the love game. The stakes are higher and the game of love has become more complicated. It's too bad the older generation of men didn't fully explain the strategy of the "I don't care" game to their sons, though I suppose the poor guys are still trying to figure it out for themselves. This is played when the male asks his sweetheart what she would like for Valentine's Day. She responds, "I don't care."

"Movies or dinner?"

"I don't care." He decides on dinner, she gets mad because she really wanted to go to the movies.

"Chocolate or flowers?"

"I don't care." He buys her chocolates.

She responds, "I can't eat these. I'll get fat!" Then she won't speak to him for the rest of the night because the guy wasn't smart enough to read her mind. Therefore, the man is always in a no win situation.

For adult women, very little's changed. Instead of flaunting their gifts in the halls of schools, they like to receive their man's declaration of their love for them at work, and they expect more elaborate gifts from their sweetheart. As a dozen roses are delivered, everyone holds their breath, hoping to be the lucky girl to display the prize on her desk, while her co-workers drool.

Valentine's Day is just another day for a lot of men, who are busy at work, thinking about their task at hand. The thought of romance is the farthest thing from their mind, unless they are fortunate enough to be reminded of the holiday. Then the pressure starts, they've got to find a gift. And it has to be a good one, something that looks like they really put a lot of thought into it. Their goal is to gain points, and if they succeed at making their girl happy, they may get that "reward" so many men constantly strive for. On their way home from work they take a detour to the nearest grocery store.

It's quite entertaining to witness the multitude of men streaming into the store, while others come out, carrying flowers and heart shaped boxes of chocolate. The quick checkout lines are busy, and the greeting card isle is crowded with guys awkwardly trying to pick out the perfect sentiment. Meanwhile, the schmucks, who have been genetically coded to forget all special occasions, which include Valentine's Day, head on home. They're the ones who've either learned to live with the consequences of their lack of action, or are very lonely men.

If one would stop and take notice, they would find very few women in sight on this special day, because they made their plans far in advance. They've already purchased their big red Valentine from last year's seventy-five percent off sale, and are just waiting for the perfect opportunity to share their love.

After giving it much thought, I've decided not to cave into commercialism of Valentine's Day this year. I'm not buying a card, no candy and no gift. No fancy restaurant, no syrupy sentiment. I'm going to tell my husband that I love him, and therefore releasing him from the pressure to give me flowers and candy, unless, of course he really wants to. And when I'm done telling him that, I just hope I don't feel bad when he says, "good."

Learn more about this author, Judy Furniss.
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