Reputations
No parent wants their child to be "that" kid. Most parents do genuinely want their children to turn out "right" but unfortunately not all of them do. Experts debate endlessly as to why this is, but some suggest that particular amounts of parental involvement can be the child's undoing. Other parents are simply unaware of what is going on, or they choose to ignore the signs. Therefore, here are a few thoughts on how parents make an only child over-protected or a brat.
Generations
Examining this topic is in some ways better understood when people study generations. The current generation of youth is bridging between the Generations "Y" and "Z". While stereotyping people is generally discouraged, sociologists do it anyway as they come up with assessments of particular generational behavior. One trait of the "Y" and "Z" children is that they are seen as rather independent, which can contribute to their perceived behavior.
Spoiled rotten
Part of the problem stems from the fact that some only children are given a great many things. Since there are no other siblings, they become the main focus for birthdays, Christmas, and other celebrations. Obviously this changes across socioeconomic lines, but even families without extensive means can spoil their children. All it takes is a credit card and a willingness to spend.
Attention
Another way to over-protect or create a bratty child is to give them too much attention. Certainly parents should give their children a lot of attention in order to grow the relationship and teach them about life. However, some parents spend so much time that their children feel smothered. Experts call them "helicopter" parents and they have been known to walk them to events, make arrangements for them well into the child's adulthood, and even go to job interviews with them.
Isolation
One way that parents unintentionally create an over-protected child is to isolate them from other relationships. Granted, this is not always done on purpose but this is another side effect of too much attention focused on the one child. If the parent or parents do not have their only child interact with others, they may find that the child does not develop the social or negotiating skills required to live in community. Since they have no one to compete with at home, they may already be at a disadvantage when they engage in other social settings.
Lack of discipline
Finally, parents create difficulty children when there is a lack of discipline. The idea of discipline can be very broad and there are many different theories and methodologies. However, the parents that struggle are often those that are hesitant to enforce any discipline. Or, they exist in a world of denial where they could not possibly imagine their child acting in an inappropriate manner. Other parents know that their child does not exhibit the best behavior, but they are unsure what to do about it. So, they deal with their child as they are and hope that they will someday grow out of it.
Making excuses
Related to lack of discipline is the issue of justification and excuses. Sometimes children are allowed to become a brat because the parents are in denial of what may be happening. As mentioned, parents do not typically desire their child to display anti-social behavior. When they do display poor behavior, it may be tempting for the parent to explain it away or make excuses to people. They may not convince other people, but there is always the danger that they will convince themselves. If that happens, they may get used to making excuses and the child's behavior will continue to go unchecked.
Dealing with the challenge
Raising an only child can be tough, but it is not impossible. Some people assume that the only child syndrome will always create a problem. However, this is untrue because plenty of only children turn out just fine. In general, parents must remember that they may have the tendency to spoil their child and even their best intentions may yield a child that displays poor behavior.