by Kayla Griffin

Created on: January 27, 2009   Last Updated: February 12, 2009

How would you define a healthy relationship with your children? To most parents this is defined by how well we are able to communicate with them, how comfortable our child feels talking to us and the trust and respect we mutually share. So how do we achieve all of this and create a healthy relationship with our children. We need to learn to not only be our children's parents but also their friends.

There is fine line that balances between being a parent and being a friend. We need to learn how to maintain that balance so we can parent our children into making positive choices. At the same time we need to learn to be their friends so they will feel comfortable coming to us when they need to talk. The most important part of a maintaining a healthy relationship is to always keep the lines of communication open. When your child feels like they can talk to you about anything, they will more willingly come to you for help and advice. This keeps you informed about their life and creates trust and respect between you both.

Many parents hinder their relationship with their children by saying things like "because I said do", or "because I am the adult" when a child asks why they cannot do something. This will stop communication dead in it's tracks and leave your child feeling unworthy. Maintaining a healthy relationship is all about opening up the lines of communication.

When your child wants to know why they can not do something tell them. Ask them why they feel they should be able to do it. As simple as this seems it makes a difference; if your child feels like what they say matter, they will be more likely to express to you how they feel. This also gives us the opportunity to share some of our ideas and wisdom with them, helping them see the negative consequences of what they are asking to do. Ultimately you will have to make the decision and it may leave you with a crying child. However you are still in the worst of situations establishing a healthy relationship where your child feels they can communicate with you.

Always make sure that you give you child your undivided attention when talking with them. If you are not giving them your time they will not feel the need to give you theirs. This is communication blocker that is very easily avoided, just make the time to have conversations with your child. These should not only occur when one is needed take the initiative to sit down with your child on a daily basis and spend time with them. This will surely end up in conversation

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