3 of 46

Write now Article Tools

Just like snowflakes

The best way I can explain how I taught my children about racial differences is by telling you a true story about a shopping trip with my three year old son. I will never forget that day when we ended up in the checkout line behind a black lady.

First, let me say that I picked the term black on purpose, and for a very good reason. All of my dark skinned friends don't like the term African American, since none of them have been to Africa in their life. They are offended by that term, and ask that if I do refer to them descriptively, they are black and just plain Americans. If any person is offended by this, please don't be. If you are from Africa, then I believe the term applies. Or if someone asked me to use the African American term, I would. I have only met one person that was from Africa, and he preferred to be described as a black person as well. He was also an American and thought of himself that way...so did I. That is why I use the term black; I don't believe this is a bad word since my father was from Ireland and I am fine with white, not Irish-American. I am not making any political statement, it's just that we (my family) do not pay attention to skin color, so when writing about racial differences, I like to make it clear why I chose my words, since words are so powerful. I wanted no misunderstandings, and especially no hurt feelings. Also, my dark skinned or black friends and I call each other by our names, of course, and I didn't know this lady's name, so I have to describe her appearance. It's just that simple.

Anyway, I will get back to my story.

My son noticed that this lady was very dark skinned and said, "Mommy, look! That lady is purple!

He said this extra loud of course.

My three year old didn't have any other settings on his invisible volume knob. If any do, please write me back...and I am referring to when they are excited. My son does understand good manners. He was just thrilled to see someone so different. He was going to preschool at a school with many children from all over the world, but it is a small school and at the time he just didn't happen to meet anyone with that particular skin tone.

Anyway, I was horrified when the lady turned to me and was obviously deeply offended...but it wasn't the offended look that bothered me as much as the hurt I saw in her eyes. I can only imagine the myriad of ignorant comments that she had heard in her lifetime. I looked her straight in the eye, as I wondered how she had been treated

• 1
• 2
• 3
• next page >>

Add your voice

Know something about Discussing racial differences with your child?
We want to hear your view. Write now!