by Frances Kaminski

Created on: January 25, 2009

The two words most often used or, to be more precise, misused to insult or express some form of displeasure are "gay" and "retard(ed)". They must be. All anyone needs do is spend a day at a local mall, attend a high school football game, or simply surf the Internet. Search either of these words on Facebook, MySpace, or other social networks and you might be surprised by the number of groups or profiles which proclaim either an individual or a group as "retarded" or "gay". Make no mistake, there are instances where these words are used in a completely appropriate manner. There are groups dedicated to raising awareness that these are not "just words", as well as their counterparts who stubbornly support what they perceive to be political correctness gone too far or an attempt to crush free speech. Yet, the majority are something to the effect of "don't see this movie, it's retarded" or "my parents are so gay for grounding me!". Some may argue that the use of these words in these fictitious examples aren't hurtful since they are not directed toward anyone.

Is it possible to imply insult without targeting a particular individual? It could be debated that there is no actual intent of insult, merely the use of colorful descriptors. Some may argue that they never use "retard" in the presence of a mentally disabled person, or "gay" within earshot of a homosexual. Others might argue that they aren't offending anyone, or that those offended are too sensitive and should "lighten up". A common theme among message boards on this subject abound with statements that it is the offended that give these words actual power, and they should just be accepted as the inevitable evolution of language. The examples often cited are that the current accepted definition of "gay" was not it's original definition, and that "retarded" is an accepted medical term for a low IQ or diminished capacity and is therefore a suitable substitution for "stupid".

When we think of the word "gay", our first instinct is to think "gay person". The word "retarded" generally evokes imagery of a person with some form of mental retardation. Yet, when people want to say something is stupid, "lame", or pointless they simply say "this is gay" or "that is so retarded". Allegedly, completely harmless statements as long as no gay or mentally retarded people are nearby. Isn't that statement alone admission that such usage is offensive to certain individuals or groups? Can these people tell someone's sexual preference, or that the cashier at the supermarket has a developmentally disabled child from nothing more than appearance? Why should someone's rights to "say what they want when they want", trump the rights of someone else?

For all the intellectual debate, these arguments are not exactly new. As a child, I remember hearing very similar arguments stating that "it's just a word" and "they shouldn't be so sensitive". Of course, that was the early seventies, and the word in the center of the debate...Well, let's just say it begins with the letter "n".

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