by Alicia Slansky

Created on: January 24, 2009   Last Updated: March 05, 2011

How to overcome some common traps for parenting an only child...

Children who are born to first time parents and then stay the only child in a household do tend to fall into one of two stereotypes. Some, may turn out to break the mold in this area, and I say "Good for them!" if they do. But most people will agree that only children will demonstrate a "bratty" air about themselves or struggle to branch out on their own because they have been over-protected for so long.

Most parents have no clue that they are contributing to behavior that will cause trouble with their children once they reach adulthood. As parents, we only want to do what's best for our kids. When we only have one child, we can go completely overboard because that's all we have.

Any group of parents discussing their kids will typically share funny little stories about Suzy or Johnny. Cute things they say or do at any point in their childhood is sure to bring smiles and similar stories from the other parents. Everyone will take their turn to input about their own kids. But a parent of an only child will usually end up toward the end of that gathering with at least one quizzical look thrown their way. The parents' proud response will generally be "Well, she's an only child so it's understandable for her to talk like she's so grown up." Every time a parent of multiple children hears a sentence with the words "only child" in it, they will automatically give the understanding nod and "Oh" as they continue to listen with a now tainted impression of that child, whether they've met him or not.

Understandably so. Even those parents had "single" children once. (Unless they birthed multiples the first go round) It's the parents who do not add to their brood that never grow out of the hovering helicopter phase of parenting. Sadly, we create little monsters out of our sweet kids, and often never see it through our heavily tinted lenses.

Here are some common mistakes parents of only children make and a few hints to help break the cycle.

- "Holier Than Thou" Complex

Some kids will grow up to think that they are better than everyone else. Maybe mom and dad thought their angel was the most gorgeous nugget on the planet and enrolled them in modeling classes at 9 months. When every waking minute is given to an only child, they grow to learn that they are, in fact, the center of their parents' universe. A parent's universe is really the only one any child will see until he or she leaves the nest and realizes that

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