by Laurie Pielak

Created on: January 23, 2009

I have heard the song "Sisters are doing it for themselves.", and "We are Family, I've got all my sisters with me.". The idea behind the songs is to unite women as a whole. However, I have found that just the opposite happens. Women will turn on each other without question, without finding out the facts. Women gossip about other women, no matter how hurtful, no matter how terrible. My mother was a military wife, and I noticed that she did not participate in woman's groups that were available. She worked, to help support my dad's salary. She did play Softball, but so did my father. She did bowl and curl, but so did my father. They did these both individually and together. She didn't have many military wives as friends, but the friends that she did have were like herself. I never heard her gossiping about the going's on, nor did I ever hear her say a bad word about any one. And so I ended up being very much like her. However, I did notice that although she did not compete with the other families, or compare us to the other kids, there was a lot of that going on.

These days, you see it more so I think. When something happens to another woman, all to quickly, there is judgement, and gossip and hurtful words, and snickering going on. We sit in judgement of other women, what they have and don't have, of their husbands and their children. We are the first to point fingers, before looking inward or what's gong on right under our own roofs. I once tried to put together a group of women, to be there to help each other. Soon the group became divided, and bickering started. Innuendo's, jealousy, and soon the group had to be dissolved. It just didn't work. Instead of being tolerant of each other, realizing that we all came from different backgrounds, and discussing differences, some let those get in the way. One would preach that she was a Christian, then as soon as she had a few drinks under her belt, her mouth and what I believe to be her true self shone through. Never apologizing for the hurtful words, but carrying on as if she was above reproach.

You see it every day. On the train, women checking each other out. At parties, and functions, especially where men are present. I have seen so many female friendships end because of jealousy, or insecurity where men are concerned it's appalling.

i swore when I was in my twenties that I would never put my girlfriends on the back burner because I had a boyfriend, or husband. And I never have.

I have also found in the workplace that's

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