by Branwen Smith

Created on: January 23, 2009   Last Updated: June 29, 2009

It is all too easy to dwell on what we haven't got and complain about how hard done by we feel we are, which is a shame because it leaves us feeling miserable and down and totally unaware of the many riches in our lives. The natural tendency of the majority of us is unfortunately to take the positive things in our lives for granted and not notice that a lot of good is coming our way.

Religions make room for a daily ritual of appreciation be it grace before dinner or a prayer of thankfulness before bedtime and if religion is part of your life you may well already be receiving much advice on appreciating what you have, but you don't have to be religious to include an appreciation of the riches in your life in your daily routine.

The trick is to put more effort and energy into acknowledging the positive things in your life than the negative, which in turn will create a positive attitude that will attract yet more good to you. Most people are aware of the big positives in their lives, like their best friends or family. It is the smaller, seemingly mundane positives that go unnoticed. Work to make it habitual to recognise and appreciate everything that is positive for you. Simply silently acknowledge in your head, "I am really grateful that that has just happened to me."

Put effort in every day to make it habitual to spot the positives in your life and congratulate yourself when you do. You are turning yourself into a more positive person who will appreciate and enjoy life more and more.

If you are having a bad day and a friend phones and puts a smile on your face, don't dwell on the bad day. Instead note that you are grateful for the phone call and then acknowledge that you are grateful to have your friend in your life. A simple, "Yes, I am lucky to have that person in my life," will immediately dilute the bad day because you have just given yourself a positive message of hope.

Find a time everyday when you are surrounded by what matters so much to you. Maybe it is dinner time with your spouse and children, or tea-break at work with supportive colleagues. Perhaps you take a daily walk with your dog through scenery that you love or you enjoy time by yourself with only a book for company. It doesn't have to be something that takes a long time out of your day even just the few seconds you spend every morning telling your spouse you love them before your both part to go about your days. Then make it part of your daily routine to be thankful for that moment every day. Routinely feel gratitude for the good that is in your life at that daily moment.

Include hope for the future in your positive thought allow yourself to dream. If you really hope to be able to buy a new car to replace your present rust bucket that keeps breaking down, imagine the car of your dreams sitting in your drive-way just waiting for you to jump into it. Remember that because you have stopped to appreciate all the good in your life you have acknowledged that positive things do come to you so there is always the potential there for yet more of your dreams to come true.

Then recognise when it is appropriate for your gratitude to be voiced out loud. When your friend phones and cheers you up and you acknowledge in your head how much you appreciate having that person in your life, take it one step further and pass some of that positive feeling back to your friend. Take the time and effort to tell your friend, "I really appreciated your phone call because it cheered me up so much on a bad day." Your message of thanks will in turn pass some of your happiness back to your friend which is an ability of yours in itself that you can be thankful for.

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