by Clare Callow

Created on: January 22, 2009

Sweeney Todd, the film version of Stephen Sonheim's acclaimed musical, is the first film I have ever seen and thought 'Alan Rickman was horribly miscast here.'

In order to understand the deeply critical nature of this comment, you have to understand my obsession with Alan Rickman. I love the man. Not in any substantial, abiding way, but in the purely shallow way of any fan in popular culture. I think he is wonderful, and in my eyes he has never done (acting-wise) anything wrong.

Until this film.

I had stayed away from Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street because, although I enjoy Depp-Burton collaborations, I find musicals cheesy and annoying. However, my curiosity got the better of me, and I had to see it.

The opening confirmed my worst fears about the 'musical' side of the film, but I had hope for the non-musical sections. Once Depp got off the boat (and away from his unspeakably annoying companion, Anthony) I was drawn in to the wonderfully macabre world that is Tim Burton's version of Sweeney Todd.

Until Alan Rickman's character, Judge Turpin, turned up.

Sitting in the dark, my eyes affixed to the screen as the images of Judge Turpin scrolled across, I was puzzled. Okay, I could accept, at a a stretch, that a man so apparently obsessed with Lucy Barker would romance her and then, when romance failed, get rid of her husband. I could possibly accept, at an even greater stretch, that he gets his kicks from pain and therefore lures her to his home in order to gang-rape her as a party trick. Fine. He's a particularly evil Evil Villain.

Then he adopts his victim's child, Johanna, and raises her in comfort and luxury, publicly making her his ward (as opposed to just keeping her as a servant). Why? Who knows - maybe he needed to boost his public image, or had a spare room. Whatever. I can maybe imagine that he could have had his own, personal reasons for doing such an outwardly kind thing. That he should be quite controlling of his ward is also not a huge surprise.

But then he tries to romance her, after basically ignoring her her whole life? And then has her locked in a madhouse when she shows signs of liking another guy? What the chickens is that about? He couldn't think of any better way to say 'I love you' than sending her on a trip to an insane asylum?

More than this, at around the point it became clear that ol'Judgey had a crush on Johanna, I underwent a stage of puzzlement which is entirely unique, for me: I began to wonder why on earth he didn't just rape

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