by Michele Hriciso

Created on: January 22, 2009

I believe there are some people who are unable to love a child unconditionally unless it is their own child. However, I think most people can love most children unconditionally.

Children are dependent on adults for all things, but especially for love. Love is what makes a child feel secure in their home. Love is what helps a child find a place in the world, both inside and outside the home. Love is how a child learns about what he is good at, and what he needs to improve upon. Love is a reflection of the relationship between the child and the parents.

I am hoping to adopt my baby cousin in 2009. I love him with all my heart and have since the day he was born. I first held him when he was 6 weeks old, and took him into my home when he was 4 months old.

One of the questions we were asked before we took Christopher into our care was if we would love him unconditionally. What can a person say to that? Of course we're going to love him. That's why we took him into our home. I never questioned whether or not I could love him unconditionally.

I can't imagine how giving birth to Christopher would have made me love him any more than I do already. My husband and I had to uproot our entire lifestyle to care for him, literally overnight. But we never complained, because of the love we have for this beautiful child. His arrival in my life filled my heart to bursting with love and joy. Every time I hear him laugh or he comes to me when he cries, I feel a surge of love in my heart yet again and thank God that I have been entrusted with this precious little boy.

For people who can't have their own children, their adopted children are their only chance at having a family. I think this increases the bond between the adoptive child and parent. After having a hysterectomy, I knew Christopher would likely be my only chance at being a mom. I remember lying in the hospital bed and holding him with tears in my eyes. I was so afraid my baby would be taken from me.

My husband has an adopted brother. I've seen no difference in the love his parents have for their children.

Unconditional love is not as much a feeling as it is a choice. With an adoptive child, you are consciously making the decision to love that child no matter what, instead of giving birth to that child and assuming you will love it once it arrives. Adoptive parents are just as likely to unconditionallly love their children as natural parents are. Unconditional love is a commitment of the heart, not a bodily function.

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