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The effects on children of domestic violence are many and all negative. Children growing up in a household where violence is a frequent activity are inevitably, and often irreparably, damaged. There exists a tension within such a family that can affect even a small baby; older children who are regularly witnessing abuse and violence are negatively affected, both in the short and long term.

Violence within a family is experienced by the children in different ways: they may actually see an episode where one parent physically attacks the other. If they do not see the abuse taking place, they usually cannot avoid hearing arguments and verbal abuse, or even the sounds of blows. They will see subsequent bruises and injuries. Often, in abusive situations, where violence is commonly used by one person to maintain control over another, the children, too, are frequently beaten and abused, physically, sexually or mentally.

The effects are numerous: children learn by example and the models they are seeing are poor ones. They are learning that disagreements can be resolved by violence, that violence is the answer. They observe that relationships bring conflict; boys may learn that men are commonly violent towards women; girls may grow up believing that violence is fairly normal behavior, which they should expect and tolerate.

Children display various immediate signs of distress, in response to their witnessing domestic violence. Young children will become anxious and nervous, will complain of certain physical symptoms and may have sleep problems. Immediate effects on older children may result in problems at school such as difficulties with concentration. There may be incidents of uncharacteristic aggression with children missing days of school and falling behind with studies.

The long term effects are more serious for the children involved in domestic violence. Inevitably, there is loss of respect for both the abusing parent and for the one abused for failing to stand up to the violence; however, the child will feel a sense of protective responsibility for the weaker parent and this feeling could last a lifetime.

The children involved in domestic violence will grow up with low self- esteem and will commonly experience difficulties in forming stable relationships; often, children who have been abused will copy the behavior of the parental model they have been shown and will, themselves, become violent abusers. Because of their lack of satisfactory academic progress, they will often fail to establish themselves in careers.

Both short and long term effects of domestic violence on children are considerable and can affect them adversely throughout their lives. Unfortunately, much of the behavior is self-perpetuating and therefore not easily eradicated from society.

Learn more about this author, Anne Penny.
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