by Melissa Cavanaugh

Created on: January 19, 2009   Last Updated: October 14, 2010

At the risk of sounding like a hypocrite, I'm most assuredly certain that couples should not live together before marriage. It's on the tip of everyone's tongue - "Why buy the milk, when you can get the cow for free?" That sums up the whole "living together" to me. While I accept and acknowledge couples who choose to live together before marriage, I do have my own point of view on the matter.

If you wonder what makes me a hypocrite - I am one, yet I'm not. This is made possible by teenage pregnancy. Yes, yours truly was a pregnant teen, albeit a 19-year-old mommy to be. I won't go into the whole sordid story - but I became pregnant and was truly surprised when I found this fact out. Looking back, this seemed (at the time) one of the most traumatic events of my life. I wasn't ready to be a parent, but I also don't believe in abortion. So, living with my parents, I had the blessed joy of telling them their oldest child was expecting a baby (oh yeah. They were expecting one themselves as well). I got through the whole "shock" of it all, and had my baby - and stayed with the baby's father. Even though we were parents, still a couple, I continued living with my own parents.

I was constantly asked by co-workers, friends, acquaintances - was I going to move in with the baby's dad? The answer was NO. I felt that although I had made a bad choice in getting pregnant before marriage (but sure got a wonderful, smart little baby out of the whole event!), I was not going to make another mistake and move in with the father. Just because we had a child and I loved him, I wanted to wait to live with ONE person. One person I'd be with the rest of my life.

You've got to think about it. Two people in love, committing their lives together, and trying to show that union by moving their belongings in with each other and living the married life. Sounds blissful? There's a catch. It only takes one good screaming match to send one party out the door. There are no permanent ties binding them together. If you are willing to make the commitment to share a home together, what is the problem with making this a reality legally? If you're going to show the world that you are giving it all to another person, what holds you back from marrying them?

I'm going to say it's nothing more than not being sure. There is an old saying, never date someone you wouldn't marry. I can't imagine saying "yes" to sharing a bed, a bathroom, your living quarters with someone but not wanting to make it a legal

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