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Sex appeal is an intangible collection of personal attributes which easily differs from one individual to another. It combines such traits as charm, self-confidence, personal style, intelligence, and even the ability to excite people sexually into a bundle which seemingly makes some people irresistible to others around them.

What gives a person sex appeal begins with one's ability to comfortably display those attributes in a confident and unpretentious manner. Regardless of the environment or social atmosphere, they are able to make those in their presence feel comfortable. Though they are easily the primary focus of attention, they are sincerely engaging to others, and engage others sincerely. They light up a room with their presence, but never demand attention.

One of the attributes that enables a person to be sexually appealing lies in the ease in which they carry themselves and interact with others. There is a genuine effervescence that both exudes from them and affects the people who they are around. Their personality is a magnet, attracting others with very little effort. When they speak, people listen. And when they listen, they listen with sincere interest.

People with sex appeal are attractive without trying to be. They are comfortable with their physical appearance and never have to overstate it. To them, self improvement starts on the inside and works outwards. They read to become informed and to satisfy interests. They exercise to improve and maintain health, and care little about the superficial benefits. They are more concerned about being a beautiful person, than about being one of the beautiful people.

One of the greatest misconceptions about sex appeal is that too many people equate it with physical attractiveness. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Physical attributes can certainly make a person sexually attractive, they may also make them physically appealing, but they have little to do with making them sexually appealing. Simply enhancing physical attributes through clothing or grooming will do wonders for dressing up the outside. But sex appeal has more to do with personal qualities which are less likely to be misrepresented by make-up and the latest designer clothing.

Sex appeal can't be faked. Either you have it or you don't. But, a person can acquire the attributes that makes them more sexually appealing through diligent effort. Those attributes should be internally incorporated into one's psychological make-up so that they are presented without conscious effort. Forcing those attributes, instead of allowing them to exude naturally, takes away from the honest projection of that quality as a genuine personality trait. Few people are fooled by a forced smile, and even fewer are fooled by an insincere personality.

It is important to mention, however, that some of the qualities that one person finds sexually appealing may not be important at all another. For instance, personal styling may be high on the list for some, and nowhere on the list of others.

But, the essence of sex appeal is undeniable in those who have it. Not everyone has that innate ability to excite and attract without focusing significant effort into it. Those who do, flaunt it without trying. Those who do not have it, generally gravitate towards those who do.

Learn more about this author, Terry Marsh.
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