by Lauren Sells

Created on: January 11, 2009

You know, I don't think there is any real answer as to how to ask a dad to help more with the kids. What may work with one man, may not work with another....its kind of like testing the waters. At least thats what I did with my husband, yes it was annoying...but I had to try several ways to find out which one he "responded" to. With my husband, being nice and just saying please works some of the time....but, (yes I said BUT) there are indeed times where I get that huff and puff and I can tell right then that he doesn't want to do anything. Which, puts me in kind of a fowl mood-but I try to press on and forget it and just do what I have to do. In most mens mind they think that just because we are the women or the mom that we are supposed to do EVERY SINGLE THING around the house. Cook, clean, do the laundry, take care of the kids..and they don't have to do anything but sit on their butts and watch the game with a nice cold one in hand. Sorry to inform you guys, who in fact think that way, thats not the way it has to be. What? Is there some secret book out there or law that says that we women HAVE to do that? I get so sick and tired of the whole "You're the woman and the mom, its your job." bit...I could scream! Some days I don't even bother asking him to do anything because I know what Ill get....taking care of my son is not a chore and I love him with all of my heart! I am not a superwoman though, and CANNOT DO EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME BY MYSELF. I need some help now and then, especially when I'm feeling overloaded. I tried to explain this to my husband as nice and as simple as possible, but he still doesn't get it. Even though I said he will do it sometimes when I'm nice and say please....he still has those times where he doesn't want to do crap like I said. I just wonder what the big deal is, why is it such a chore for a man to help a woman out? After all, it took two to tango...so he should be helping too. Sometimes it seems like he's just a part time babysitter more than a dad, yes I know thats sad but its true. I dont want to think that way or feel that way, but thats how it is. Really, I dont know what to do. Should i just stress myself out to no end, suck it up and kiss his butt, wait on him hand and foot? Make sure ALL of his needs are met, when and how he wants them? At times, I feel like noone understands and Im just being a whiney baby...but after talking to friends and others that I know, I realize that I am not alone. There are alot of men that way! I would just like to know, from a man, what the big deal is. I dont want to hear all of this mumbo jumbo bullcrap about, if you just talk to us this way and that way, do this for us and this, this, this, and oh yeah this...then Ill help you out. What nerve! YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE THE FATHER! Its amazing that they want to act that way, then when the wife decides to pack up and leave, then they want to step up and try to get custody....hahaha get real! Men, men, men...cant live with them... cant live without them.

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