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With fifty percent of American marriages ending up in divorce court, people are trying to figure out what makes a truly great marriage. I've never been divorced. In fact, I've been married to the same guy for 21 years. Every year longer that we are married, I discover more about my husband than I ever thought possible. In fact, I find myself falling deeper in love with my husband every year. After this many years, I have discovered that I have a deep found respect for my husband and our marriage gets better every year.

What it really takes to make a great marriage is no matter how different the two people in the marriage are, is that they love each other. Without love you have an empty shell of a marriage. You need to have the common bond of love to aid each other every day. Being married is about having someone on your side, you become part of a team. The two of you need to work together to create a home, and a life together. It takes love, and respect, and being kind to each other.

What I have learned over the past 21 years is that marriage is not easy. Anyone who tells you that marriage is really easy is not telling the truth. Yes, people can find their soul mate and live happily ever after. But marriage comes down to several basic fundamentals; you need to have love, respect and the ability to work hard at it. Marriage doesn't have to be a job. Marriage can be a lot of fun and be very rewarding. But a great marriage takes hard work. The two people have to give and take, and be there for each other. The two people have to do things they don't want to do such as listening to their partner talk endlessly about his job throughout dinner without complaining.

What else makes a great marriage?

Being able to laugh at yourself and not take yourself or the relationship super seriously. You will need to have a terrific sense of humor to have a great marriage. You need to have a good time with your spouse. You will laugh and cry together and you will need to laugh at certain times when you feel like crying. It helps when you step back from the situation and think about and laugh with your spouse about the situation. This makes the two of you feel better and then you can work as a team to work out the problem.

Always remembering you are not alone. You became married to have your best friend always on your side. Utilize your best friend in good times and in bad times. Your spouse is there to help you. Working as a team when you are married is the best way to make it through

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