by A. Marie La Porte

Created on: January 08, 2009   Last Updated: November 30, 2009

"Dear Mommy," Alyssa wrote in her diary. She looked down at the page for a moment, wondering to herself if maybe she was getting a little old to be starting her diary that way. She scratched it out and started again on the line below it.


"Dear Diary ..." She looked at the page and once again scratched out what she had written. Just before she had passed away, Alyssa's mother had given her a diary and told her that when she was feeling sad, she should write down how she was feeling in the diary. She told Alyssa that even if she wasn't there to talk to Alyssa about her problems, she would know all about them because Alyssa had written them down. Ever since the, Alyssa had addressed her diary entries to her mother. Was she getting too old for that now, she wondered? She was fourteen after all. She scratched out what she had written once again and started over.

"Dear Mommy," She wrote again. "I love you and I hope you don't take this the wrong way but I think maybe I'm growing out of starting my Diary entries like this. I don't mean that I don't want to address them to you but calling you Mommy still seems a little childish. From now on maybe I'll cal you Mom. If you hadn't gotten sick and were still alive, I probably wouldn't still be calling you Mommy. I hope you understand.


"Moving right along ... It seems like so long ago that we moved away from home and came here. I know that we live here now and all but back home will always be home. I love it here but it just isn't the same. For instance, it's December and I haven't seen one snowflake. I remember making snow angels in the back yard and that one time before you got sick when you, me and daddy made an igloo in the back yard. That was so much fun, even if it did cave in and we never got a chance to actually camp out in it. It was fun making it because we were all together.


"It seems totally weird to think that, but I kind of actually miss the snow and cold weather. A Christmas without snow just isn't very Christmasy. I miss back home with it's snow and outdoor ice rinks. I haven't been able to get into the Christmas Spirit and Christmas is like three weeks away. I talked to Eric about the parties we used to have and I want that again. I am gonna ask Auntie Michelle tomorrow if she will let us have the party here. I have so many ideas. I remember making popcorn garlands with you when i was little. Okay, you made the garlands and I ate most of the popcorn. I am really looking forward to this. This is gonna be great. Goodnight Mom I love you.

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