by Christal Collette

Created on: January 08, 2009

Have you ever needed service on your computer? Maybe you just need to order a new pair of "kicks" and you can't do it online. Often your call for a service representative is redirected to another country. You might have to talk to someone who can barely speak English. Speaking with an outsourced employee, over the phone, is hard but possible with the right preparation.

First, you want to make sure you are in a comfortable place. Depending on your current age, marital status, and economic standing you will want to choose wisely. You might want a bean bag if you're twenty or, a rocking chair for the older crowd. If you're a business man you might consider one of the softer chairs in Starbucks as opposed to the stools. Certain people like to decorate art deco; this does not offer the maximum comfort for overseas conversations. If this is you, go to a rental center and start payments on a floral print couch. Finally, if you have childrenfind a sitter. This will take a while. Once you're in your happy place, get something fun to do.

Second, purchase some aids in your quest. I prefer cough drops for the times you have to scream. You also want an aid for boredom. My suggestions are: a stereo, palm pilot, Sudoku puzzle, coloring book, food, or a NASCAR color by number. Another aid is a cordless phone. If you do not have a cordless phone.you're looking at solitary confinement for the next two hours. Some intense callers prefer to purchase a wireless headset for added maneuverability so you can finally connect with that person overseas.

Third, make the initial call. Remember not to wear rings; they tend to hit an extra digit on the phone and will cause your call to be redirected. Dial the toll free number. When the call goes through expect an automated voice at first. This person will take you through a series of steps so you can speak with a human. Some of these steps include: saying the word "yes" ten times loudly, and punching in a twenty digit long reference code. Once this automated voice is done with youthey will put you on hold. You will consider starting a small project at this point. Don't do it. You are about to reach a human being. When you do reach that personjust for funremember their name.

Forth, you are now on the line with "John". It is important to note that "John" is not his real name. His real name will have twenty syllables and could possibly rhyme with "drew". Upon hearing his fake nameit is your job to ask his real name. This puts you on a personal

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