by Terry Loving

Created on: January 08, 2009

"Should a manager date an employee?" My answer is "No!" For one thing the manager may have to unfairly grant special privileges to the one that he is dating, if he or she doesn't want to rock the boat. In my case, I was the employee, and my ex-husband was the store manager. Not only did I date my store manager, I married him. What a mistake on both parts. It was not a very comfortable situation to be in.

This handsome man who seemed to command much respect smote me. Little did I know that the respect and fear that my co-workers had for him was really loathing. Not only was he a hard taskmaster, but also he wasn't very nice to some people. When my co-workers would talk about how much they hated my ex, I could only sit there and nod. There wasn't much that I could say, because I didn't want them to know that I was dating the man that they hated so much. And I didn't want to go back and tell him what they said about him. I would listen very intently to their complaints however, because I wanted to know more about the man I was dating. Unfortunately, their complaints had no bearing on relationship issues, so that didn't help me much.

The cat didn't stay in the bag very long, for I didn't have a vehicle of my own, and I had to depend on my now ex-husband for a ride to work. People started watching and putting two and two together. When we got married, I had to transfer to another company supermarket, because our relationship was against company policy. The store manager could not be the superior of his spouse or other relatives. What made people take notice of us was the fact that he would always leave the store, and I would shortly arrive. He would come home to give me a ride to work, and hang out in the parking lot until I clocked in and started my shift. People aren't stupid, especially when they want to get the goods on a store manager who is mean to them.

When we were dating, I unfairly expected certain privileges like working on the floor. If you ever ran a register, you know that working the floor was like an escape. You had freedom to roam, and you weren't chained to one spot. But of course, all of this was a part of him wooing me into marriage. The down side of this was the fact that I didn't see his verbally abusive nature. He would often yell his displeasure at my co-workers, but I would shrug it off, as they should do what they were told. Some were slouches, and I thought that, "Oh well, do what he tells you to do." Even when he yelled at his own superiors,

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