by Christopher Mcphail

Created on: January 07, 2009

A good neighbor is a rare gem in this world, especially with all of the cookie cutter subdivisions that seem to sprout up like wildflowers after a summer storm. A neighbor, good or bad, can well determine if your happy in your home or not. When looking at the qualities that make a good neighbor, one needs only look at the qualities that make a good friend.

A neighbor should above all else, be somebody that we want to be friends with, as they will in most cases at least, be someone with whom you spend a great many years coexisting with. They should be somebody that you look forward to seeing, someone that you enjoy spending time with, and someone that you can count on.

You should be able to count on them when your home and need a cup of sugar or a stick of butter, as they should be able to count on you for the same. You should be able to count on them when you suddenly find yourself in need of a tool, and don't have the time to run to the hardware store. You should be able to count on them when the wife wants a room rearranged, and you need a strong back. You should be able to count on them when you need somebody to watch your kids if you need to run out really quick and don't want to load up the family truckster. You should be able to count on them at the times when you need them most, regardless of the situation. In my opinion a neighbor should be your extended family.

I am very fortunate to have a neighbor who is all of this and more. We moved into the neighborhood within a couple months of each other, and it was an instant friendship. He has been by one true friend in the area as we were transplants, much the same for him. Whenever we run out of something, we can always call him and his girlfriend and they are more then willing to help, be it a cup of creamer, a cup of sugar, or a loaf of bread. We have a key to his house, he has a key to ours. He is on the pickup list as a person authorized to pick up my children, he is also an emergency contact. Not only do I know I can trust him with my children's lives, they know he can be trusted. We have had more then an occasional meal together, sometimes we eat together two or three times a week. we have celebrated numerous holidays together, and we try, if possible to have coffee every night. He has a chance to talk about his day, my wife and I have a chance to talk about ours. Everything he is for us, we are for him. Coffee hour as we call it is almost like therapy. The children even understand the importance of adult time, and leave us alone for that "hour", even if sometimes its only for a few quick minuets. He is everything a friend should be, and more, he is everything a neighbor should be, and more. I can't think of any other person I would rather live next to then him.

A neighbor is more then just someone you wave to occasionally, or strike up small talk if you happen to be in close proximity. A neighbor is more then just a good fence as Robert Frost said, a good neighbor is a good friend. When looking for a neighbor, you are often stuck with what you get, but if you have an opportunity to look around, and buy a house, then goto the neighborhoods and see what the neighbors are like. See if this is somebody that you can more then just tolerate, see if they are a pseron you could be friends with. If you buy a house because it is a beautiful house, but fail to see what comes with it, you may find yourself in a situation that your forced to make work, and that is rarely a good thing for all involved. A forced relationship will always fail, but one that comes naturally will grow and become a foundation for so much more then just a neighbor.

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