There's no easy way to change everything the moment the New Years Eve ball comes crashing down in Times Square. There is rarely a life altering light that shines down from the sky and snaps you out of years of debauchery and sloth-like behavior. If you do happen to see one, it's probably the surplus of cheap champagne.
It's a sad state of affairs when the idea of resolutions is practically a joke - that the media at large refers to such efforts as idealistic and perhaps "a nice idea", but something you won't necessarily honor past the first few weeks of the year, much less 12 months. It's a common sentiment that we laugh under our breath as we make these lists of things we'd like to improve on, sometimes admitting way before hand that it's hopeless.
"I'm going to lose weight, manage my finances, and be nicer to my sister-in-law!" Yet by February 1st, you're not financially recovered from Christmas, which stresses you out, so you cram another piece of pie into your mouth and think of excuses to avoid your sister-in-law until you're at least five pounds lighter. Why isn't it enough to want change?
The first step to keeping resolutions is to drop the cliche mindset. Don't make a list with the intention of being idealistic and vague. If you want to make resolutions that stick, be progressive and realistic. Change is most often effective when evolutionary, not revolutionary. Be prepared to work on your life in stages, and for resolutions to act as guidelines along the way.
You may choose, before you put pen to paper, to spend a day ruminating over the current state of your life. Who you've become vs. who you wish you were. Rather than frustrate yourself over the difference, try to calmly analyze yourself objectively. What concrete steps have you taken to get where you are (whether or not you planned them)? Identifying them will be helpful in setting up reversal strategy if necessary. Do this sans-distraction. No electronics or screaming kids in the vicinity.
Make a first draft list. Write down whatever comes to mind naturally, whether it's a steady flow of ideas that spans pages or a simple five item list. Don't be incredibly superfluous with your statements. If it isn't on the front burner right now, chances are it's not one of the imminent problems you're facing, and you can afford to deal with it later. Usually weight, money, relationships, and organization/time-management are the main concerns. If you're hung over on cheap champagne, "Stop drinking cheap champagne" might be one of them. Just let it out as it comes.
Next, change your perspective on resolutions. This will help you edit your cascade of items into a manageable battle plan. As you review your ideas, consider what motives are really behind each one. Are you losing weight because it has become a health concern? Is it pure vanity? Both are valid reasons, but behind each there is a different strategy employed and you need to know which to pick. Will it be more beneficial, for example, if you hang pictures of Adriana Lima on your fridge to remind you not to overeat, or photos of your grandkids who you want to see get married someday? Are you being nicer to your sister-in-law because it pisses off your spouse when you fight with her, or do you genuinely want to enrich the quality of the time you spend with her? The former might require calculated tolerance whereas the latter might require a heart to heart conversation.
Often our resolutions apply to a web of problems that are more complicated than they appear on the surface. You may discover as you attempt to become financially stable that it's impossible to figure out where you stand because your paperwork is an organizational nightmare and you haven't scheduled enough time in your daily routine to sort it out (because you can't learn to reject invitations, or you waste too many hours in front of the tv, or whatever it may be). When you discover the chain reaction of issues yet to be resolved, don't throw up the white flag and assume it's hopeless. Motivate yourself further - because clearly there is some work to be done. Regardless of age, it's never too late to work towards a more satisfying state of being.
Work with yourself, not against yourself. Don't lump "my new years resolutions" into a list of chores that stress you out - things you don't want to deal with. Consider them a new formula to apply to your life, and be conscious of your decisions in light of the change you desire. The moment you let resolutions become another thing you'll get around to, you're doomed. They are not tasks to complete. They are goals. They are reformations to work on.
Last bits of advice for keeping at it? Re-arrange your bedroom, living room, or entire house. Where will you be making your most crucial resolution-related decisions? Clean that space. Empty it out. Physical refreshing gives way to mental refreshing. It will feel like a new chance to improve if it looks like one when you walk into the room. Can't stay motivated on your own? You are never on your own. Even if you can't enlist family members to be actively aware and supportive of your endeavors, there are countless self help/motivational speaking tapes that can kick start you with just a few minutes of listening each morning. My personal recommendation is Anthony Robbins' "Personal Power."
Finally, keep in mind that we're all flawed human beings. Do your best, and be patient with yourself. Wanting change is only the first step. It will take time to build up momentum and perhaps even to identify the best method for achieving the reformation we need. Constantly assess your progress, and stay motivated by remembering the reason we make resolutions in the first place: We want an improved quality of life. As human beings we have a basic right to pursue this goal under whatever terms apply to us. The ultimate key is perspective.
This is your year - and every year after this is going to be your year as well, so long as you grab it by the neck and make the most out of it.