by Sarah Brodie

Created on: January 03, 2009

Even though sharing is one of the first lessons humans are taught as toddlers, many of us still find it difficult to share as adults. Maybe not as a whole, but maybe still in specific situations. I am a kind and considerate person by most accounts but I have one situation that constantly arises that I can't seem to overcome and it involves my husband.

Let me preface this by stating that I love my husband at a depth I never knew I was capable of giving. He came into my life after a failed marriage and an abusive relationship. I have given myself to him and put my complete faith in him. I have never allowed anyone to get this close to me or allowed myself to give so much to anyone else. These baracades have been firmly in place since early childhood and I expected them to be firmly in place well into my golden years.

I can freely give anything to my child. The last bite of food, miss the end of a movie I've been watching for two hours to answer a question I really don't know the answer to, or anything else he might need. I know, most of will do anything for their child, but this helps to exemplify how completely crazy I am when it comes to this one little thing with my husband.

When we sit down to watch television, if my husband is in the living room prior to me, he will ask me for a drink. Is he asking me to go back to the kitchen and make a new drink for him? No. He wants a drink of mine and I resent having to hand my glass over to him for this drink. Am I worried about germs? Of course not. So, what is it?

It is the simple fact that he takes gigantic drinks. It drives me crazy! Why would he rather drink half of mine in a couple gulps then have me go and just fix him one? I don't think I will ever get my answer to this and I will forever be ranting and begrudgingly handing my cup over to him when we sit down for a movie or game. Why? Why wouldn't I? I love this man and he works hard to take care of our family and will do anything he can for us. So, is me sharing my drink with him really a big deal? It is for me!

The importance of sharing in a marriage can be influenced by a variety of factors but it is primarily an issue that needs to be decided upon by both parties. Are there issues that are considered off limits? I share more than I probably need to with my husband and he tends to be a little more private on some issues. There are parts of my husband's life that do not readily flow from him but I have faith they will be divulged when the time is right for him.

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