by elizabeth bliss

Created on: January 03, 2009

Ex-love: The haunting nature of past relationships.

To assume responsibility for the specific cause of a break-up should never be placed on one person. The break-up is normally mutual just not both parties are willing to admit it. I can say I have a haunting ex. Not a lot of what-ifs, for me anyways. He decided to contact me, and I suppose he assumed that I would drop my life and come running back, he I guess figured after 8 years I wouldn't have moved on...call it a teenage love affair...he's left bitter and angry....for reasons unknown to me...other than I found my place, my happiness...and he blames me for his Problems.

I suppose it's easier for the gilded lover to push blame on the other to feel better about the situation. Naive me thinking that I'd be able to make him feel better without giving him the wrong idea. So what started with him unable to let go of the past, no results in an angry person...one I can't help but feel sorry for.

I don't think anyone intentionally tries to hurt an ex...but sometimes that person is so consumed with the past that they can't see the future.

I try not to dwell on the past...otherwise I too will be left bitter and angry. I wanted to wish him well and try to leave things on a nice note...even after eight years...but I guess it's just not that easy for him. He said he'd understand if I didn't want to...but instead leaves angry comments....I regret the day I signed up for my-space...someone decided it was a sick joke to play on people...sometimes you shouldn't try and find people.

The past is called "the past" for a reason...something that once was but will never be again...an ex maybe not necessarily a mistake but all in the same should remain in the past...but you shouldn't be haunted by it.

I try not to be a hypocrite and let my past experiences dictate my future relationships...but there's always an unmistakable new "step" to the romance dance one contributed by each heartache...so sometimes you tread lightly as if in a waltz, or stomp your feet like a pompous ass doing an uneducated version of river dance.

If you wish to remain angry then blame yourself...not your ex...

If you were honest with your self and sat down and revised every situation you too would see that anger is a wasted emotion and maybe just maybe it wasn't I that broke your heart but you broke mine...I was just able to change, overcome and adapt...and eventually move on.

Maybe one day people will learn that destiny doesn't necessarily mean forever, just a moment in time.

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