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Seduction is a skill. It's the ability to cloak a man into a woman's awe, and then make him surrender all control over his own faculties. People say it's easy. But it's not. Any woman can get a man to f$%k her. But getting a man to the point where he wants to have satin-sheet-searing sex with you, complete with all of the passion that lovemaking brings, takes a hand-crafted, yet natural flow of events to occur.

So let's tackle the oxymoron first. How can you hand-craft something yet make it natural? The answer lies in your personal level of competence and sensuality. What is, and is not, comfortable. Sure you want spontaneity, but within the confines of how far you are willing to perform. If not, you lose control, along with your chance to shine. For example, if you're a great cook, then fix a meal. That's natural. But the key is to find out what his favorite food is, and exactly how he likes it cooked. Don't waiver. Yet if you feel really crafty, find out what his favorite meal is from his childhood and cook that with a certain twist, whatever you can come up with under your little chefs' hat. But be careful. Mess up Mama's cooking and the night will be ruined. Of course this is an example. You must plan your own sequence of events and activities. But also show a little flexibility. Part of successfully gaining control is having the ability to relinquish a little of it.

OK. The evening has been planned. What's next? Nothing says "I want you all over me" more than nice lingerie. Again, the same concept of comfort can be applied to wardrobe, ambience, etc. Beauty is not defined by size. But if you are not completely comfortable with your body, don't put on anything too revealing. Even if being bigger doesn't faze him, it will directly affect your confidence, so don't go there. Wear something sexy yet less revealing. There are plenty of options. Remember, what pleases him is only as good as your acceptance of it.

And don't do a striptease if you can't dance, please. You will embarrass yourself (unless you are attempting the cute angle, then it's ok). But if you are truly stepping to the plate, with all the makings of an erotic goddess, try something more full proof for yourself.

Seduction, in its purest form, has nothing to do with sex. Luring a man into your bed, in the hopes that he takes you like money from an ATM, is all about the mind. You have to soften him so that he is willing to give you control over his feelings. This is tricky.

The best way to relax him

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